Republic Commando: Only You
by Etain-Skirata
Summary: This is my take on how Republic Commando: Order 66 should have ended. All AU, multi-chapter continuing into an undetermined point during the Empire. Rating changed due to sexually explicit material. Sorry for any confusion it might cause, but I'm editing all chapters, and I hope to have my scanner working by the re-post's end so I can give it a new cover.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: Star Wars was created by Lucasfilm Ltd, and is now owned by Walt Disney. The "Republic Commando" series was written by Karen Traviss; the secondary language, _Mando'a, _was created by her,too. I don't make any money off of this, and do it purely for my own and hopefully those who read it's enjoyment.

Author's Note: I would like to thank Fires of Hope, who beta read this chapter.

edited January, 2013: includes new cover art "Longing on Qiilura" by Yumehoshi-san on deviant art. com.

Prologue

_The Jedi didn't hold with relationships-` attachment,' they called it- but they didn't expect Jedi to be celibate, either. That seemed to be asking for trouble. One day, they'd get some lovesick Jedi doing something crazy, whatever the training was supposed to knock out of them and it wouldn't end well..._

-**RC-1136, a.k.a. Darman Skirata, musing on the nature of Jedi and relationships **

**Omega Squad Hadde-Rishun Road observation point, **

**Haurgab,Mid Rim; **

**approximately 937 days after the Battle of Geonosis**

**...**

**0010 hours after the issuance of Contingency Order 66**

We can see the cordon zone around the Jedi Temple from a nearby park. The smoke hangs thick in the air, billowing from the burning Temple and the various other nearby buildings. Starships from both our side and the Seps' had crashed into the other buildings during the repelled CIS assault on Coruscant that ended mere hours before. Most of the fires at the Temple had started after the troopers from the 501st Legion had entered. I don't know if they started them through stray shots, if they destroyed something there that shorted out, or if the Jedi set them to slow the attackers down.

Any of those is possible, even likely, but there are other, much more important thoughts that have taken up residence during the last ten minutes since the command for us to kill my wife and her kind.

The last time I heard from her was a written answer to the_ Mando'a_ wedding vows twenty minutes ago. originating somewhere on the outskirts of the capital's solar system.

_What's taking her so long to land? Where is she? _I wonder; my worry turns into full fledged panic, as a blue holographic figure appears over my squad sergeant, Niner's greaves. Shab_, it's Palpatine again. What does he want now?_

_"Sergeant, some of my spies in the vicinity of the spaceport are saying that there are Jedi over there. Your armor's tracker indicates that you're near the Jedi Temple. Let my new Apprentice deal with the traitors' home._"

"Yes, sir." he replies, sounding anything but eager to get to the spaceport... I don't blame him. The holo flickers and disappears. "Well, looks like we'll need to leave our armor here when we get out."

I know that, but I'm reluctant to leave it behind.

My son by our squad's immediate superior had drawn a picture of sorts on my armor the last time we were here. Something tells me things wouldn't be easy during the extraction, and if the worst should happen, I'd need something to keep me going. "Wouldn't it be enough to deactivate our trackers one at a time and make them think we're dead?"

Before any of my brothers can answer, my comlink is the next to crackle to life and I jump, startled. "Etain to Omega. On the ground, at the CSF staff club. I'm in civvies; repeat... no more robes." She sounds somewhat out of breath, and in the background, I can hear the ominous, all too familiar _chug-chug-chug_ of a Republic Gunship. _They're looking for Jedi,_I realize, and my worry ratchets up yet again.

Answering, the first terse words spoken to her since she left for Kashyyk a month ago from my squad are from me;

"Etain, we're holed up in a park two kilometers from the Temple. Meet us here with Kad and we'll wait for extraction together. We have two transports on the ground,_ Aay'han_ and Ny Vollen's crate. We'll wait in the park for one or the other to pick us up. We already know it's not safe to go to them. We've been getting reports of Jedi on the loose all night. And we all know that not all Jedi overcome feelings of desire for revenge, no matter what the training's supposed to suppress."

"Copy that, _C__yar'ika._ Just let chaos reign supreme for a few more hours. After all, we need cover to get out of here." She's commanded troops long enough to know that when a mission goes wrong, her job is to keep things looking better than they really are. The attempt is transparent, but I can't fault her for trying.

Her voice sounds muffled and quieter. She had apparently turned away from the receiver, but I can still make out what she's saying... `Laseema, let me take Kad. Omega somehow ended up near the Temple. It'll be easier to get off-world if you go to the spaceport alone. The new recruits might be dimwits, and incompetent shots, but they can figure out when something looks out of place. A Twi'lek trying to evac a human would more than likely raise their suspicions.'

There's no indication of what my squad mate's wife answers with. At least, not for another five minutes. Even carrying my year and a half old son, and hiding from who knows how many patrols, Etain can make good time when she's motivated.

Quiet voices reach my ears, one: female, too calm for tonight... Etain. The other: muffled, and child-like. Obviously, whatever Laseema said were words of agreement, because she wasn't with them.

The childish voice takes on a hopeful quality and a higher pitch. "Da-da? You out dare, da-da?"

Etain's voice takes on a cautious tone. "He should be, Kad." Louder, the tone she'd often used when issuing orders cuts the evening air. "_Dar'ika_, would you mind coming out where I can see you... if you really are here."

Slowly, I step through the bushes separating our positions. There were two reasons for her inability to see me, and one very good reason why she couldn't sence me, either. Without the clear air that usually happens on this part of Coruscant at night, visual range for a typical sentient has been cut to ten centimeters, because of the smoke in the air billowing from the nearby Jedi Temple; the other explaination has to do with the fact that my squad mates and I had hidden from patrols behind a bushrow.

As for the inability to detect us with what my adopted father calls `mystic mob radar', well, as of tonight, that's suicide.

"Etain, follow the sound of my voice..." I stop talking and my breath catches in my throat when I hear a muffled thump from nearby, followed by choked, fearful sobs. "Kad, where's_ Buir'ika_?"

"She fall down, da-da. Mama has owies."

"I want you to listen to me, son, and do exactly as I say. I'm going to turn a light on. When you see it, I want you to come to it. Crawl. Don't try to walk. Will you do that for me?"

"What about mommy?" I can hear his desparation not to be forced to leave Etain's side; it's the same desparation I have to get to her, something I can do only if I can get my child to leave her.

"I can only wake her up if I can find her, Kad. That's why I'm asking you to come to me." The searchlights on either side of my armor's helmet flare to life, casting haunting glows on the smoke all around me. "Can you see that, son?"

"The funny yites, Daddy?"

"Yes, those ones." There's a rustling sound off to my left, not too far away and getting closer. Slowly, a small shape becomes visible. Crawling like he had been told, the figure of my little boy moves to me out of the haze, a rag covering his face that looks vaguely like his mother's beige undertunic.

Without being told to, Laseema's husband, Atin, moves out of the bushes and reaches out his arms to hold the toddler.

Kad looks between me and the `stranger' in my clothes, at least to him. At my nod of reassurance, however, he moves toward my brother and lets Atin scoop him up in a loose embrace.

I follow the path Kad had taken to reach me, using the infrared setting in the helmet to follow the small handprints in reverse to find Etain, who'd been passed out for two minutes, fifteen seconds; it seems like an eternity when you're worried. Reaching her prone form, I crouch, remove my thick glove, and place it in front of her open mouth, silently begging her to exhale. Even in the midst of passion, it had never felt as good as it would now if she'd just humor me for _fierfek_'s sake. Ten more seconds of nothing. Fed up with waiting for her to breathe on her own, I remove my helmet as fast as I can pop the seals on either side and gag. Even low to the ground, the smoke from the burning Temple not so far away is cloyingly thick. I reach my bare hand to the side of her throat to search for a pulse and find one. It's weak. I gather as much breath as I can and, after yelling for my brothers to get Kad out of here, bend over my unconsious wife, place my lips firmly against hers, and let the rest of my reserve air out into her lungs.


	2. Chapter 1

**A\N**: The thanks for this chapter belong, in part, to The Fires of Hope and

Danni Lea.

**1.**

_"When I think of working, fighting and living alongside the Jedi and consider what they tried to do... I can't take it, it makes me sick. How could they betray us like that?"_

**-CT-1904, a.k.a "Trap",**

**1,089 days after the Battle of Geonosis,**

**discussing Order 66 with several of his squad mates**

"Where are they?" Kal Skirata, Darman's former training sergeant and adoptive father, paced the corridors of his ship, _Aay'han_, agitated. The rest of the family, including Atin and Kad, had already entered, and were relaxing in the main cabin, the sitting area. Etain and Darman were the only stragglers. The fact that he had agreed to pick them up notwithstanding, the condition to rescue his son and daughter-in-law was Dar's call. He kept some of his attention on his grandson, knowing that if something happened to either, Kad would know first. Etain's connection to the Force had been passed to him, so Kal knew the connection between Etain and her son was stronger than the typical parent and child. Kad stuck a stuffed toy in his mouth and was sucking on it: the indication of nothing yet going wrong. If Darman would just call, everything would be fine. Laseema walked up to Kal and put a hand on his arm. He temporarily stopped pacing to turn around and brought his head up sharply to warn her off of trying to comfort him.

Atin recognized the look, put Kad on the floor, and went over to Laseema. He would guide her out of the way, before she could get in too much trouble. Laseema lowered her arm and followed her husband toward the cockpit. She stopped to take Kad with them.

"Leave him, ad'ika. Kad's my Dar-and-Etain-ran-into-trouble warning system. Did any of the commandos teach you the basic start-up checklist for ships like _Aay'han_?"

"No. Atin's been too busy trying to teach me how to defend myself."

"And, judging by what happened to the last di'kut who flirted with you, he did a good job."

"Darman, for obvious reasons, was busy with Etain whenever he had leave unless she wasn't here. In those circumstances, he stayed at the barracks. I don't know what Niner, Corr, or Fi did, but they tended to make themselves scarce."

Turning to look directly at Niner, Kal asked him to set the start-up sequence, instead. Niner obliged; Laseema followed him toward the cockpit, turning for the cabins at the last minute.

Ordo, Mereel, Kal, Kad, and Bardan were left behind in the lounge area. Ordo was the first of Kal's former trainees to be adopted. Along with his squad mate, Mereel, they were the only Null Advanced Recon Commandos to be on Coruscant when Kal pulled the desertion short straw. The situation the Skiratas found themselves in forced them to cut their losses and fold the hand. Kad had tried to follow Laseema, but Bardan intercepted and scooped him up. The blonde haired, tough looking former Jedi Knight held onto his nephew determinedly. Kad's new fussiness focused Kal, who looked askance at his only non-clone male adoptee.

"I don't think they've run into any more trouble than when Omega left, Kal'buir. I think he's just tired. It's been a long day for everyone. I do think, though, that you're wearing a hole in the hull with that pacing you've been doing. That won't help anyone. Udesii, Kal'buir. They'll be here when they can."

"You mean _if_ they can, don't you? The way my day's been, I don't think it's likely that they haven't run into another problem, Bard'ika."

_You'd think it's "invite your troops to a party" night at the Temple the way they've been going on the patrol. The regularity of it is starting to make me dizzy. Come on. Can't they tell that the Jedi in this area are already all dead?_ Darman Skirata heard a moan off to his left and turned in that direction. When the first of the patrols had come by, he'd hauled an unconscious Etain back behind the bushes where he and his squad had hidden earlier in the evening.

As she had already began breathing on her own again by that point, he'd decided that other than keeping the patrols from spotting them until she came to, there wasn't anything else he could do. She was finally coming around.

"Dar?" Etain asked groggily. The nickname for his name was music to his ears. Not that there'd been too many beings in his life, except his creators, who'd called him anything else and most of those had been on the opposite end of his blaster when they'd said it.

"'Morning. cyar'ika." Even though it was obvious to anyone with the sence of sight that it was still night, Darman was so happy to hear her voice that the urge to say that was too strong to deny. "Sleep well?" He couldn't resist that, either.

"Since when did you start sounding like Fi, Dar'ika?" She was just a little disoriented, but she did have a point. While Darman was Omega's eternal optimist, Fi had always been the jokester of the squad. Clones all looked alike but their personalities were different. Sometimes very different.

"Since he was hit by the concussive blast of that bomb on Gaftikar. We were short a morale officer and Corr wasn't always up to the task."

"Where's Kad?" she asked after looking around and not seeing him.

"Atin took him back to _Aay'han_ at my request. We're just waiting for the patrols to stop going past for more than ten minutes."

"In other words, waiting for them to get lazy. Shouldn't we move away from the Temple, Dar?"

"Under normal circumstances, I'd say that's a good idea, but the same patrols that present a problem in getting to the _Aay'han _have also pinned us behind these bushes. Unless you have some skill with a Force cloaking shield that you've never mentioned..."

"If a skill like that existed, don't you think some ultra-moral Jetii would have used that to desert their post?"

"There was a time when I wouldn't have hesitated to answer that question with a yes, Etain. That time, and the innocently naive view that there were many `ultra-moral' Jetiise is long in the past. We'll need a lot of luck, or the Force, or whatever, to get out of this mess in one piece."

A\N #2 Another chapter should be coming soon.


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own either Star Wars or Republic Commando. Star Wars belongs to George Lucas and his companies. Republic Commando belongs to LucasArts games. The story up to the beginning of this one and all characters were created by Karen Traviss.

I'm only borrowing, although I did change a few things to make it more palatable.

**2.**

_Mhi Solus Tome,_

_Mhi Solus Dar'tome,_

_Mhi Me'duini An,_

_Mhi Ba'juri Verde._

**-Mandalorian Marriage contract**

"Darman to _Kal'buir._ We're ready for extraction; repeat, come rescue us. _Et'ika'_s awake and ready to get out of here." Darman's voice came from the speakers in tha _Aay'han_'s cockpit, stopping the conversation among the Skiratas already aboard.

The ship, created as both a boat and starship, had been purchased in order to locate and capture the chief scientist in charge of creating most of the clone troops in the clan, in the hope of undoing the doubled aging rate. So far, there were few indications that any such`cure' was forthcoming.

Kal touched a few icons on the control panel as far bow-ward as one could get on _Aay'han_. The ship lifted off of the spaceport tarmac. "Finally, _ad'ike_."

So much had happened since Etain had first met Darman and his squad on Qiilura that it was difficult to process it all. The secrecy that the relationship she had with her husband had started under... It would be easier to carry on now that the freedom door on the situation was opening; she only wished it were under better circumstances; that most of the beings she'd known her entire life weren't lying dead on the Temple floor or a battlefield somewhere, courtesy for the most part of their own troopers.

Darman tried to roll over and grab his blaster rifle, which he had left behind the bushes when he had retrieved her while she had been unconscious. It just had to be out-of- reach, didn't it? And Etain was lying on his left arm, pinning it, and therefore, him, to the ground. "_Et'ika_, please move. I can't reach my Decee."

"Of course, Dar... _Ner Cyar'ika_, do you remember back a month, what we were talking about?"

"Laseema's appartment, or before?"

"Laseema's. The youngling part."

"Yeah, what about it?"

"Let's see; how the _shab_ do you say pregnant in _Mando'a_, anyway?"

Darman had been a man of divided attention before he heard the word `pregnant'. Etain senced the shift with that one word.

"_Yaihadla_... Wait, back the hovertram up. _Kad'ika_'s going to be a big _vod_?"

"That's right. I senced a child inside while meditating on Kashyyyk, a girl."

"Well, at least someone saw fit to say something before this child was _a year and a _shab'la_ half old._"

"I thought you realized that I wanted to tell you right from the start with _Kad'ika_."

"Did _buir_ really threaten you?" Darman sounded both hurt and confused, something that a brief and focused Force-sense probe confirmed.

"Yes. I went to him to ask what the _Mando'a_ word was; he was livid. He said if I ever said anything to you before his okay, he'd take him away and raise him, himself."

"_Et'ika... ner riduur_. You know, I might be worth something on boy's names... but I'm osik on girls'."

"You're willing to let me name our daughters, then?"

"Until I have some confidence with it."

"Okay, let's see. Our first daughter will be Callista. I had an ally in an alternative _Jetii_ Order with that name. And it sounds good with `Skirata'."

"Callista Skirata..." Darman tried the name out. "I like it." He finally managed to retrieve his prized weapon right before they heard the chopping whine of ship engines overhead.

Etain identified it before they could really see it. "_Aay'han_. Bardan just contacted me through the Force." She sensed a second presence, little more than the sensation of a comforting hand on the shoulder. "And Kad, too." She reached back, mostly to let Kad know that she was okay after the scare from earlier.

Watching the _Aay'han _enter hover mode a meter off of the ground and the landing ramp lower into position to let them board, Darman held a now standing Etain from behind, partly to support her, in case she fell again, partly just to hold her for it's own sake.

Her dark hair was blown in all directions and he was briefly amused to find that some ended up flying in his face. That, however, got old really quickly. "_Ni kar'tayli gar, Cyar'ika_." His shout was lost to the noise the ship was making, but he felt the need to say it... I love you, sweetheart.

A gauntleted hand came down the ramp to help them up; Green armor... Bardan, then. Letting go of Etain was necessary for either of them to get on board. It didn't make Darman any more comfortable doing it. He was afraid that to step back was to give some sniper at the Temple the go ahead for a potshot.

Etain took Bardan's hand and stepped up onto the ramp. _C'mon, chakaare. Are you going to play loyal, when all you really are is di'kut'la?_ Darman's silent challenge to the new trooper intake, or anyone else at the somewhat distant Temple, went unanswered.

"Are you coming, ner vod?" Bardan's disembodied voice pulled Darman out of his thoughts. He helped himself up the ramp. Etain was already at the top. "Buir, the stragglers are in. Ramp's going up." True to the words, Etain's former fellow Jedi slapped a pad off to the side of the `door'. The appeture hissed closed. "Okay, buir; take her up."

Etain managed to brace herself, barely, before the ship lifted into the upper atmosphere. Darman, without the extra warning the Force gave wasn't quite fast enough registering the last comment. This caused him to stumble briefly before he managed to right and brace himself, in that order, against the two nearest bulkheads.

In space, and somewhat safe from the fighter intervention that almost everyone on board was half-expecting to approach at any minute, the Skirata clan set themselves the task of finding a place to sleep for the journey to Mandalore; the ship was on auto-pilot, so Kal, the family's patriarch, was in the main cabin with the rest. Kad had wandered over to his parents as soon as Fi, one of Darman's former squadmates, would let him up. Etain had him on her lap and was absent-mindedly stroking his curly black hair, the same color and consistency as his father's. His eyes were getting droopy, a sure sign of exhaustion. Darman had taken a field bedroll from Etain's pack and was busy laying it out on the main cabin's floor. Atin and Laseema had claimed one of the crew quarters. Ordo and his wife, Besany, had claimed the other. Kal had sworn from the day, years ago now, that he took on the responcibility of training the Nulls, that until they had the aging where it should be for his sons, he wouldn't sleep in a bed so his plans entailed sleeping in the pilot's chair, instead.

"Kad's asleep, Dar'ika. Would you mind taking him so I can streach?" Etain drew his attention from the bedroll for a minute, long enough for him to acknowledge her comment. "I can finish the bed, cyar'ika."

Taking Kad and allowing Etain to stand, Darman sat at another of the seats bolted to the deck.

In spite of herself, Etain spared a glance at her husband and their son while smoothing the linens over the mat. Then she took a position on her back on the floor.

Darman laid Kad carefully on Etain's chest, trying not to wake him in the process before positioning himself sideways on the rest of the `bed', his arms going around her waist. She moved over so that her head rested against his chest.

From another dimention, Jedi Master Kast Fulier, Etain's former teacher couldn't help but smile. His former apprentice was happy; he'd known that she held herself to some rather low standards in terms of her skill in the Force. She'd expressed doubts in herself aloud while he was teaching her. He'd answered:

"You must do what you can live with, Padawan. Don't ever hold yourself to standards that you feel are unattainable. I think, though that you'll be rather impressed if you let yourself go; don't hold any expectation either way." She had taken his advice to heart. Where many of their shared allies were dead, she was alive to pass on the legacy that he'd given her in her own way. That was what he had always wanted for her. The loving father figure in him appreciated the chance she had been given by the Mandalorians. _I hope you're happy, Etain. I'm proud to have called you my student and friend._


	4. Chapter 3

**Author's note: Thanks, as always goes to Fires, for having patience with me through the writers' block. My apologies for taking so long to everyone reading this, as well as my gratitude to those who've commented.**

**Chapter 3**

_The worst thing about Mandalorians is that they are scum who pose as law enforcement of a sort. And the galaxy lets them get away with it. _

-Anonymous Imperial officer

10 days after Order 66

_Manda'yaim._.. Mandalore, a place that Darman had heard about throughout his childhood, but never thought he'd actually see. Snow lay on the ground, covering everything in a white sheet, and Kyrimorut shimmered as the sun reflected off the icy crystals.

He saw Etain approach him from the side, Kad sleeping in her arms. "Come on, _Et'ika_. I want to see where my son was born. And where my daughter will be." Darman wrapped his right arm around her shoulders and led her inside, holding her close the whole way.

Once inside, Etain took the lead, showing Darman the way to the bedroom she had stayed in the one and only previous time she had been there. To her surprise, upon entering the room, she saw the few things she had left behind still sitting on a wooden dresser over in one corner. The bed took up a large part of the room along the same wall as the door.

A crib rested along one wall, where Kad had slept for the first week of his life. A new, "big boy bed" was in place, for now, along the opposite wall, and would probably stay there until Kad was comfortable at Kyrimorut, and then be moved to an adjoining room.

Etain gently laid their sleeping son on the third bed, then began readying herself for bed by slipping into the 'freshers to finally remove the foreign feeling civvie clothes and take a shower.

Darman, understanding exactly what was expected of him, pulled the thick, patchwork quilt down, and with it the remaining linens; he had, after all, done this before.

However, Etain's voice, issuing from the refresher, pleaded otherwise. "Dar, no sex tonight, okay?; I don't want to wake _Kad'ika_."

A slight tinge of apprehension and anxiety gave Darman the idea that his wife was being slightly self-conscious. It wouldn't have been the first time.

Entering the refresher, Darman approached Etain from behind and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Come on, _Cyar'ika_; time for bed." His breathing coming out slowly but heavily, the almost sigh was apparently to ensure that the maximum amount of the exhalation made it's way as closely as possible to her ear. He may not have done this many times before, but he sure remembered all of her sensitive spots.

"I know, Dar; you're feeling deprived. But I mean what I said about sex." Etain added the last after feeling, against her bare inner thigh, what Darman was dealing with from seeing her naked. He too had stripped down to as minimal as he was willing to while still being exposed to the chill air in the mini-clan's room, the bottom half of his GAR issue bodysuit. But their escape and the long flight back home had taken their toll as well, she was too tired to reciprocate his advances.

"All right," Darman sighed as he ran his hand up the warm, water slicked skin of her hip. "But only," he added with a grin, "because I know we have the rest of forever to spend together... Finally."

Etain smiled in return and turned to press her forehead against the side of his neck. "Finally," she echoed.

Darman and Etain Tur-Mukan Skirata, husband and wife, lay down in the bed together, side by side. The second night of their marriage shaped up to be slightly more comfortable than the first for both of them.

...

"Bad dream, dada." Kad's voice woke Darman from his own slumber.

He stirred and, propping himself up on an elbow to glance out of the room's only window, Darman noticed that the sky was still dark. In his groggy state, he wondered what the local time was. Picking up his chronometer, he made out the numbers 0350 on the built in chronometer display.

For a moment he wondered why his son was awake at this Force forsaken hour, then he remembered that Kad had slept for most of the trip back from Coruscant.

Turning his head on his pillow so that he faced the middle of the bed, he saw that Etain was still sleeping peacefully next to him, still in her sleepclothes, which she had changed into after the shower.

Gently, he pulled the covers back up onto her shoulders after they had fallen down onto Etain's bare arms while the newlyweds slept.

She started to stir and awaken, green eyes starting to flutter open, but he told her, "Go back to sleep, _Et'ika_; I'll take care of it."

She mumbled sleepily in agreement and settled down again. He noticed that a few stray strands of her mostly dark brown hair had fallen into her face and lovingly pushed them out of the way, his fingers lingering slightly longer than they needed to by her ear; before reluctantly turning away, he whispered, "_Ni kyrtayli gar darasuum, riduur._ I'll be back soon... _ori'haat_."

After taking the time to reassure Etain that all was relatively well, Darman lifted Kad out of his bed and allowed his son to lead him down the closest corridor to the main living area.

He was surprised to see his disabled former squad sniper and medic, Fi, already awake.

"_Su'cuy gar, vod'ika_. Inactivity didn't kill you yet, I see." Darman greeted Fi with his customary cheerfulness, reguardless of the early hour.

"You're up early, Dar. We're not on military schedules anymore, you know."

"I guess Kad's nap the whole way to Mandalore threw the _osik_ into the works of what little schedule he had. He woke me up and I brought him out here so that we don't wake up Etain."

"You're_ jatne'buir bal jatne'reduur_. A great father and an excellent husband. I hope we can all reach that high mark you've set for us, Mister I-don't-want-kids-right-now Skirata."

"_Shabuir_. Did everybody hear about that?"

"Pretty much,_ ner vod_. I know as much as the next man that beings' minds and situations change."

"Being stuck here has turned you into a philosopher,_ F'ika_. That sounds like something Etain or_ Bard'ika_ might say." Noticing that Kad was on his way toward the door back to his mother, Darman called his son's name.

When he was sure that he had Kad's attention, Darman asked, "Do you want to play a game,_ ad'ika_?..."

Kad looked intensely at his father before solumnly nodding.

"Come here, son."

Kad toddled over to his father's side across the floor, pulling himself up when he reached the living room chair that Darman was using.

"_Buir_'s gonna be mad,_ ner vod_. That's his chair." Fi pointed out unnessarily; Darman knew that.

"I'll take my chances," Darman replied, casually crossing one leg over the other. Turning his attention back to his son, Darman laid out the idea for his game: "I'm going to say a word in_ Mando'a_, _ad'ika_. I want you to show me what, or who, I'm talking about. Ready? Okay. The first word is `_solus_'."

One of Kad's chubby toddler's fingers came out of the fist that he was using to hold himself upright on the chair, earning him a smile, and a "Good job, son," from his father.

Obviously pleased with himself, Kad offered a grin of his own in return.

"Try this one... `_Kad'ika_'."

At this, Kad used the same finger that he had used to answer the other question to point to himself. "I Kad!"

"Smart boy, Kad. Two more. The third one is `_Buir_'."

This one took Kad a few seconds. Then he pointed to Darman.

"Right again, son. Last one...` _Ba'vodu_'." Uncle or Aunt. In this case, the correct answer would involve Fi being singled out. Both men could tell that Kad was trying to wrap his mind around the word.

Reluctantly, Kad pointed to Fi. It was obviously a guess, but neither man had given any hints in expression or anything else to indicate the last correct answers.

Kad could see that his father's face had broken into a huge grin at the final part. "You're a clever boy,_ Kad'ika_."

"He obviously takes after you, Dar." Fi joked.

"Watch it, _vod_. If you're questioning Etain's intelligence, I might just forget about the damage from the Gaftikari bomb and smack you one, myself. My wife is not a _di'kut_."


	5. Chapter 4

**A\N: I'm currently in the middle of packing to move, so watch the stories list to see if there's an update. Or put this on alert. Either way, don't expect a new chapter after this for at least a week.**

**Also, there's a poll on my profile page about this. Please vote. (If you have a suggestion for another option, I'm open to adding it, so get in touch with me via PM, and you might find it on the poll.)**

**Battle fatigue, better known in modern times as PTSD (Post-traumatic stress disorder) was first identified in the 1860s during America's Civil War.**

**Sorry for the false starts on the chapter. I think it's finally ready.**

**It's about to get a little more steamy in here. You've been warned.**

**Glossary (This is a chapter heavy on the _Mando'__a)_**

Mir'sheb (Mando'a) Smart alek; smart ass

Udesii (Mando'a) take it easy; relax

Verd (Mando'a; in context, with the suffix _-ika, _later sufix -_e) _little warrior(s)\soldier(s); used affectionately

Kuur (Mando'a) be quiet; shut up (most often an order)

Chapter 4

_Even what you leave behind, you carry with you, always._

**-Kast Fulier to a teenaged Etain Tur-Mukan, **

**Six years before the Battle of Geonosis**

...

At first light, Darman heard Etain up. Still tired from the twenty minutes of keeping Kad from waking his mother in the early hours of the morning, Darman covered his head with his pillow and tried to go back to sleep.

Osik_,_ _I thought she'd still be trying to catch up on sleep after the war. She was at the front more often than we were._ Then, he realized what that meant for the night ahead, and, against his better judgement, a small smirk spread across his face._ Of course, she probably fell back on some _Jetii_ trick for replenishment. I wouldn't be surprised._

"Dar, I _know_ you're awake." Etain's voice issued from the lower half of the bed.

Darman felt the covers bunching at one point, an impression that was confirmed when he felt her hand on his knee.

"Come on, _Cyar'ika_. I was never a morning person, and even _I_ woke before you." She cajoled.

"Etain," Darman growled, slightly annoyed, "The only reason that happened this morning is that I spent about twenty minutes last night trying to keep Kad from waking you up."

Then, he pulled his arms out from underneath the covers, and wrapped them around her waist, half-sitting up in order to do so, the pillow falling aside, as he gave up the idea of ever getting back to sleep.

He felt her stomach tense under his hand, and pulled her against him, before rolling on top of her, eliciting a small squeal of surprise.

Etain must have noticed the change in her stomach muscles as well, for she turned her attention toward him and said, "I think our daughter knows her_ Buir,_ already."

Gazing into her eyes, feeling himself getting lost in their green depth, Darman let his lips quirk upward in a mischievous smile.

Catching sight of his expression and correctly guessing his intention, Etain said, "Don't you dare, _Dar'ika_." Her warning was only partly successful; she realized that a second later.

Pushing himself off her, he started tracing a line of kisses down her right side, from her face to the stretch of her ribs starting at her ear. As he reached her clothed hip, he brought them across her stomach, then up along her left side on a symmetrical path. He then proceded to lower himself onto her.

By the end of the kisses, she was panting slightly.

"_Et'ika_, you are wearing far too many layers. Self- conscious or not, these_ shab'la_ things have to come off, sometime."

To better make his point, he slid his hand under her shirt, so that the hand rested directly on the warm, smooth skin of her lower chest, her breathing, harder while still quiet, and heartbeat, accellerated in excitement, easily noticable to his touch.

"_Cyar'ika_, don't keep denying yourself or me." His advice was issued within inches of her left ear, and seemed to arouse her. "_Fierfek_, we should have taken more time together while you were visiting us during the war_." _

_In other words, quit stalling and sleep with me, Etain._ This thought made Etain blush furiously. But he had a valid point. _Why in the stars was this so easy when it was forbidden, but now, when there's nobody to catch us, is it suddenly so hard? Shab, speaking of hard..._ "Dar..."

"No, Etain. I'm tired of the excuses."

Her lips curved into a devilish smile. "I wasn't going to offer one."

Etain had obviously held the bold side of her personallity in reserve for a genuinely open moment in their relationship, as Darman had rarely seen it.

"What's wrong? Tusk-cat got your toungue?" The playfulness of her tone was reinforced by the smile on her face.

"No. Where'd you put the reserved _Jetii Et'ika_? _Not _that I miss it at the moment."

A thoughtful frown briefly took the place of the ear-to-ear grin of the moment before, and Darman wondered what had sparked the change of expression, worried that he had said something wrong. A confused concern that was just as quickly alleviated.

"_Jetii Et'ika _ took an unplanned leave of absence. Although that's a persona that I'd just as soon never wear again."

Then Etain suddenly turned toward the door, and Darman felt his stomach drop as though he had just ridden the express turbolift from the upper repulsor pods in the Republic Senate chamber to the hidden escape tunnel directly beneath the Chancilor's podium. Which, if you hadn't ridden it before, was fast.

"Please tell me that we're not about to be interrupted after all that."

"I_ think_ so... I don't like it any more than you do."

"Whoever it is, it better not be anything too important."

_Knock-knock-knock_.

"Gilamar and Bardan."

Etain's certain identification of their guests didn't make Darman more eager to recieve visitors, especially _those_ visitors.

"And I'm still sore from the last time Gilamar vaccinated me against who knew what."

"Quit whining. We won't know what they want until they have a chance to talk to us." Etain pointed out rationally.

"Come in." Etain raised her voice, so that the invitation was sure to have been heard by those outside the door.

The gold armored figure, Mij Gilamar, entered first; Bardan entered just behind.

It wasn't to be a social call, then.

The head medic of the bastion, Gilamar was the brain to Skirata Senior's all-brawn approach.

"Etain... Darman, your turn is next. Etain, you know the drill."

"_Osik_, and here I was, thinking that I was safe," Darman cursed.

"Watch it, _ad'ika. _If you're not careful, I might use my extra rusty, large guage needle on your _shebs._"

Etain rolled up her sleave before Gilamar had the chance to ask her again.

Darman pulled her into a loose embrace, letting her hair fall across his shoulder. "_Mhi solus tome, Et'ika._" He gave her shoulders a rub, while the medics did their job. His hands then wandered down her back, to stop at the lowest end of her spine. "I know _Jetiise_ can take on the pain of others; can they also transfer their own discomfort?" With the question, Darman felt Etain tense again; let his hands wander back _up_...

The question was meant for Etain, but it was Bardan who answered. "Yes, they could. What would you want to take on her, to you _phantom_, pain for, when you'll get it so much worse?"

...

After Gilamar left the room, it quickly became apparent that Bardan had something more to say.

"What is it, _ner vod_?" Etain asked.

Deciding to cut right to the chase, Bardan asked, "Was there someone in here other than you last night, _vode_?"

"I don't think so, unless someone else came in while we were in the shower... Or maybe you were sensing _Kad'ika."_

_"Mir'sheb_; Etain, I know what Kad feels like. This was more vague, like a presence not yet fully formed..." Bardan reached out toward Etain through the Force.

Etain, not fond of the intrusion, slammed up a barrier to keep him from sensing anything.

The block physically knocked Bardan back two steps.

"Stay out of my head, _Bard'ika. _Don't even think about probing Dar, either." Etain's warning was accompanied by the extension of her Force-barrier to include Darman, reminding Bardan of a red synthstone wall around a building.

_"Udesii, verd'ika._" Bardan held his hands out before him as he backed away. "I didn't mean anything by it."

"Yes you did, _Bard'ika_. Don't lie. Even _Dar'ika_, Force-blind as a blisterfly though he is, can tell."

"Etain, _kuur_." The use of her first name, instead of the usual nickname, was enough to shock her into silence. Darman had to be really annoyed with her to use it.

And she remembered all too well Kal's lecture about a pregnant _Mando'ad_'s place in the bedroom. Submissive; lower ranked.

It was hardly her place to question Bardan, and it _sure _wasn't her place to question Dar. Averting her gaze, she asked in a scared voice barely above a whisper, "I'm really in trouble, now, aren't I?"

Instead of answering her immediately, Darman told his original direct commanding officer to take Kad and get out.

Once the door shut behind Bardan, Darman, who never had raised his voice to anyone, gave Etain the most severe dressing down she had ever received, even after a fight with the other younglings in her creche.

...

Later in the afternoon, Etain found herself roped into helping Laseema and Besany with evening meal. While she didn't know either woman well, she did know that they had taken care of Kad during the war, and would always be grateful for that.

Noticing her silence, Besany decided to talk to her. While Etain wasn't really in the mood to start up a conversation, or be forced into one, she was willing to engage in small talk with her sisters-in-law, or even just one to pass the time.

During the verbal rant from Darman earlier, Etain hadn't said anything in her defense, and hadn't said much since, either. Instinct told her that in saying something, she would have been opening a door that she didn't want to open more than a little at a time._ Especially if the Darman that showed up earlier is what comes out._

_Mhi solus tome, mhi solus dar'tome._ We are one when together, we are one when apart. The first two lines of the Mandalorian marriage contract had replaced the Jedi Code as her source of strength. A contract that, more than any other, was _never_ meant to be broken. _What does that leave, then?_ she wondered.

"I know that look , _vod'ika._ It's the look of someone caught with their _kama _off."

Besany, like Etain, was just learning _Mando'a,_ and was picking it up slightly less quickly. Etain knew the other woman wasn't stupid; she just hadn't spent enough time with those who spoke it to be proficient at it yet.

Etain recognized both words from conversations she'd overheard.

Fi was the only being that Etain had encountered, other than Besany, who could comment, even make a snide remark or two about the latter, a flexible piece of Mandalorian armor, one Besany's husband refused to remove for anything, without the threat of imminent bodily harm.

Etain wouldn't be stupid,_ dikut'la, _she reminded herself, enough to mess with Ordo, the quintessential Mando of the Republic.

As Ordo had once told her, he only fought for his brothers, _not_ for the Republic. Of course, his brothers did fight for the Republic at the time, not really giving him much choice but to do the same.

"It's nothing, Besany... Really." Etain tried to lie her way out of talking, but she could see the other woman's light eyebrow arch skeptically.

"No go, _ner vod. _I don't buy it."

...

Ever since he'd yelled at Etain three hours ago, Darman had felt sick with guilt. But he didn't know how to go about making things right with her. The last time he'd felt this conflicted was when Etain had confided in him that she and _Kal'buir_ had kept the fact that he was a father a secret. Etain was his life, and he could see as soon as the words left his mouth that he'd hurt her. He didn't even know what had happened. It was as though the analyitical part of his brain just _shut down_.

_Okay, Darman... Think. You didn't earlier and look what happened. Maybe I do have the right name._ Darman, Dar'manda, _can be interpreted as something less than a person._

Getting out his datapad, he decided to try a note as an apology.

Opening the document feature, he typed out:

_Et'ika, I can't believe I kriffed things up so much. I don't know why I said some of the things I did. You always have been my light, _ner Jetii.

_The fact that a son, mine ans yours was one of the only gifts I was ever given, doesn't diminish the gratitude I feel every time I look at Kad, or the love I feel for you, his _Buir'ika.

_I guess it does sometimes take screwing up to realize what really matters._

_I guess ultimately what I mean is _n'eparavu takiset._ I'm sorry,_ Et'ika.

Kyrtaylir gar,

_Darman_

He left the datapad on, and propped it up on her pillow so she could see it if she came in to get something. Then, he headed for the rear door of the house to go for a walk.

...

Etain let the tears flow freely. She had spent a lot of time trying to be strong during the war, but the argument with Darman earlier had proven to her yet another thing she couldn't do right.

She thought she heard the clomping of boots, _ceture_, on the hardwood floor of the room she was sitting in.

Then a gauntleted hand was placed on her shoulder and she guessed correctly who it was. "'_Cuy, Kal'buir," _she greeted through choked sobs.

"What's wrong, _Et'ika_...?"

"_Naas, Buir._ Just a misunderstanding between Dar and me."

"You're married now, child; It won't be the last... Take it from an old hand at this, but remember, it's just as much about Kad, now. Your son needs both of his parents, not just one. You'll work it out... I've learned to trust that both of you can."

Kal got up and turned to leave, when Etain stopped him with a hand on his arm and said, "_Vore_, Kal."

Half turned toward the door, Kal stopped and turned back. "Anytime. I'll go and see if I can get Dar to tell me what's going on. I've always told Dar and his _vode_ that if they would ever find themselves a girl to never go to bed angry, no matter what might have been said or done during the day. I lost my ex by doing that too many times. Well, and she didn't want my kids raised Mando. I wonder what she'd say if she knew Ruusaan joined up with me of her own accord."

"Raising _Kad'ika_ Mando isn't a problem, _Buir._ It is after all better than raising him as a _jetii_, either on my own or, especially, had he ended up at the Temple. And much better than trying to raise him as an _aruetii_."

And, with that, Kal Skirata, training sergeant, and failed, then redeemed father, turned back toward the door and left the room.

...

Kal went to find Darman, and found him out by the planned memorial site. "_Su'cuy, ad'ika._ Want to talk?"

"What's there to talk about? The fact that I treated _Et'ika _like _osik_?"

"She was really hurt by that, you know. So, did you plan that, or did something just come over you?" Kal joined Darman in staring out at the mid afternoon sun.

"That's just it; I didn't want to hurt her; I_ never_ wanted to hurt her. I couldn't help it. My girl and... I... just... couldn't... help... it."

Hearing the regret in his son's voice over the words that he couldn't take back, Kal felt a fresh wave of anger, bitterness and resentment toward the Kaminoans for kriffing his boys up so badly. All he could do was to offer them a shoulder to cry on and a sympathetic ear when they needed it. "I know, son. I know."

Darman, after taking a few minutes to collect himself, told Kal most of what had happened with Gilamar and Bardan that morning. He concluded with, "I just lost it for a minute with her, _Buir_. I'm such a _di'kut_."

"No you're not, son. I've seen many _verde _with a lot more life experience than you and your brothers lose it for a minute or two. It's called `battle fatigue'. That's the problem with raising boys for their entire lives to fight and nothing else. Eventually, no matter how well trained, they burn you out. Most of my other boys didn't last half as long."

"What happened to them?"

"The _Kaminiise_ killed them, or they killed themselves, or they got careless on a battlefield. The result's the same. I don't think I have to finish that." Kal sighed at the memory of all the boys who never had a chance to know what Darman knew, to have what he did, "You have a boy who needs you, and a woman who loves you. You are stronger than that, though you might not think so at the moment."

"I'm not going to off myself, _Buir, _if that's what you're thinking... As you said, I have too much going for me. But I can't face Etain right now, either."

"Okay, son. Is there something you want _me_ to tell her, instead?"

"_Naas _that she won't figure out on her own."

...

After evening meal, Etain was feeling slightly better. So content, in fact, that she decided to go back to the room and try to take a nap.

When the door opened, she immediately spotted the note. Walking over to the bed, she picked up Darman's datapad, reading the note three times. The first, she skimmed it, the second time, focusing on the _Mando'a_, especially the words she didn't recognize, and the third, taking in the note as a whole.

Once she finished reading the note the third time she briefly moved the note from the pillow to the blanket.

Changing to sleep clothes was unnecessary, as she would be changing into her day clothes in a few hours, anyway.

Kal had promised her a set of armor all her own, but with the Empire riding the _beskar_ miners hard to only mine for them, and Kal having to be discrete in Kyrimorut's location, it was taking a while to obtain it.

Etain pulled the covers down so that she could climb underneath them, before picking Darman's datapad back up and resting it on her chest. She then pulled the covers back up over her shoulders. She let her other hand rest on her abdomen, feeling Callista respond to her mood for the first time by moving under her hand.

Smiling sleepily, Etain sent the thought to her unborn daughter through the Force, _Su'cuy, ad'ika._

Etain's eyes drifted slowly closed.

...

Darman's entry to the room was after Etain had been asleep for five minutes. 0610 glowed in red on the ceiling from a hologram room chrono display.

The sunset cast a beautiful glow on Etain's sleeping face, reminding Darman of the stories of Force-ghosts he had heard spread through the Jedi ranks during the war. He thanked whatever the cosmic powers that be were that he didn't have to endure losing_ his _Jedi.

Letting his arousal temporarily dissipate, he went to his side of the bed and covered himself up, as well.

However much he wanted to, he refused to push himself on her, especially when she wasn't awake. Although after the disaster that he created earlier, he took a risk and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, whispered another _Mando'a_ apology, and let sleep claim him.


	6. Chapter 5

**Author's note: **As some of my readers have pointed out, the previous chapter was hardly my best work, and I sincerely apologize for that. All I can say in my own defense is that I was lazy in the writing phase, and therefore, messed myself, and this story up. As soon as I discover a way to remove and replace some of the bad points of previous chapters without messing with the other chapters' positions, I _will_ fix that.

I also apologize for the delay in posting this chapter. Once again, thanks for betaing belongs to TheFiresofHope.

I'm working to get caught up on the review replies, so if you left one and I haven't gotten back to you, please be patient. And thanks to anyone who participated in my poll (referenced in chapter 4 Author's Note). For those who haven't yet, and want to, it's still open on my profile page.

I based the position of Mandalore in the galaxy on "The Essential Atlas", a Star Wars profiction reference book written\compiled by Daniel Wallace and Jason Fry. I personally swear by reference material, whether canon, fanon, or other, in my writing, even using bits and pieces of books I don't particularly enjoy as a jumping off point for many of my fanfics, as with this one.

**Disclaimer #2:** After looking over what I _do _own, I noticed that I still don't own either Star Wars or Republic Commando. Although I do own many pieces of Star Wars merchandise. Darn it; I'm really grasping at straws here.

...

**Chapter 5**

_If compassion is encouraged for Jedi, and love is the logical extention of compassion, why shouldn't Jedi love?_

-Etain Tur-Mukan's private journal

Written at Quibu's safehouse

during the Coruscant anti-terrorism operation

384 days after the Battle of Geonosis

...

4 days after order 66

Kyrimorut, Mandalore

Outer Rim Territories

...

When Etain awoke the next morning, she noticed two things immediately. The first was that Darman's strong arms were wrapped tightly around her shoulders. The second was that the note was missing. She looked for it and saw Darman's powered down datapad on the dresser. She briefly entertained, but just as quickly dismissed the notion of sliding out from Darman's embrace to get it and see if the message was still on it.

Instead, she rolled to her left, facing her sleeping husband. She had discovered, during the undercover- for them in more ways than one- mission on Coruscant, that she rather enjoyed being wrapped in Darman's arms in the early morning hours, snuggling against his broad, well-muscled, and usually bare at the time chest, no matter what planet they were on.

Two nights before, as a result of her strong Force-bond with Darman, she had caught flashes in her sleep of Darman's dreams as he had experienced them. Most of them weren't pleasant. Losing his first squad on Geonosis, having Fi knocked unconscious on Gaftikar, having to shoot two Republic soldiers before they killed him, beating Kal near senseless on Coruscant, and something that didn't make much sense, her dying in front of him. She vaguely recognized the surrounding buildings, or so she thought, from Coruscant. But he _knew_ she was alive. She'd ask him about it when he woke up, she promised herself.

Other than random incidents imagined by his subconscious, there were relatively pleasant memories, as well. Some downtime while the rest of Omega were at Quibu's with the other Republic, or neutral soldiers on the Coruscant anti-terrorist mission. Including the circumstances that led to Kad's conception, she remembered, blushing.

The Mandalore star was just beginning to peek over the horizon visible from Kyrimorut and she knew that in a few minutes even with so low a population in relation to what Kal had hoped for, the bastion would quickly become noisy.

Darman's arms tightened even more.

_Okay, enough of this. I can barely breathe._ Etain struggled enough in Darman's arms that even sound asleep he would have to loosen his grip, but not so much that he would wake up.

_There's a reason you're still here. You might as well make the most of it._ An amused voice that seemed to come from everywhere at once told her. A voice she knew as well as her own or Darman's.

_Master Fulier... It's been a while,_ Etain greeted through the Force, the same method as Fulier used to start the `conversation'. As soon as she thought the name, a glowing blue figure appeared in the corner and started walking toward her.

A sad smile appeared on the apparition's features. "It has, my Padawan."

Etain spared a quick glance at her sleeping husband to see if her deceased teacher's words were the final straw to waking him fully.

"He can't hear me, though if he were to wake up on his own, I imagine he would be able to see me. That's partly by design, and partly because I personally can only fully interact with those I knew in life."

"It's not that I'm not pleased to see you, Master. But what are you doing here?"

Chuckling, Kast Fulier's spirit said, "Impatient as always, my Padawan." Then, just as quickly as the jovial mood appeared, it was gone. In it's place was seriousness on a level that Etain, who had known him even before her nearly nine year apprenticeship with him, had almost never known. That made her take notice of what he was about to say. It was far worse than she thought. "Vader. He's looking for you and Bardan specifically. If he finds you, he'll find your son."

"Why us? Bardan left before Order 66 was called, and I'm not strong enough in the Force to be much of a threat. Why not someone like Kenobi, assuming _he_ still lives?"

"Palpatine..._Sidious..._" Fulier spoke the latter name with the same disgust as if referring to something he had scraped off the bottom of his boots. "He feels threatened by you both because of who you chose, and still do, to associate with." He indicated Darman's still sleeping form, followed by the rest of Kyrimorut with his glowing, right, dark-robed arm.

_Oh, fffForce. Why the _shab_ did Uthan have to create that nano-virus?_ Etain thought. She worried that Palpatine would drop a dirty bomb on Kyrimorut if he found it. The virus in question had been designed to target Fett clones by seeking out their DNA, but was enough of a threat to their descendants to worry her about Kad's and Callista's safety assuming that the Empire used it. "Is he desperate enough to use a WMD on his own army to draw us out, or put out an alert for Kyrimorut's location?"

"He's a _Sith_, Padawan. Who knows what they'll do to get what they want? But you know _some_body will be made to suffer." Fulier looked away from Etain for a moment, then finished with, "The only questions are who and how badly. I can't stay in the living world much longer before I have to rest."

"Don't strain your visiting time, Master. Go... I'm alright for now. And thank you."

Fulier seemed to fade away, but just before he disappeared completely, he managed to say, "You're welcome... May the Force be with you, Etain."

"And with you, Master." By the time she finished her end of the customary Jedi "good-bye," she was talking to empty air.

The blanket shifted, pulling away from her, but it really didn't matter as she was fully awake. She started to sit up, and finally heard Darman moving consciously; he was awake, too.

"_Et'ika_, where are you going?"

"Outside. Listen, _Dar'ika_, about yesterday..."

"Forget it, _Cyar'ika._ _Cin vhitin_."

"What's that mean?"

"The closest translation in Basic is virgin field of snow. A truce."

"Dar, we're in trouble. Bardan and I. There's an Imperial search going on for those who were trained as Jedi, and we're top on the hit list."

"How do you know, _riduur_? Did you sense something in the Force?"

"No. Not exactly. But the Force did warn me in another way." How much did Darman know of Force-ghosts? Etain didn't realize, intimate as they were, that Darman had been thinking about them himself the night before. "Kad's under threat in this too, Dar."

"How? The _Jetiise_ didn't know about him, did they?"

"On the day of Order 66, Kal told me that he was asked about him in a meeting with Zey, but didn't know how much or little Zey knew."

"And if Zey was aware of him, and Vader was in the attack on the Temple, Vader might have found whatever Zey used as his source of information." Darman finished the point.

"Right. _Osik_, Dar, this whole thing has become one mess after another. Why can't the galaxy just leave the few Force-users alive alone?"

"I don't know, _Et'ika._ For what it's worth, there's a possible answer that occurred to me. Your _Jetii_ friends from the alternative philosophy pile... Do you know how to contact them?"

Nodding, Etain voiced her only real objection to her husband's suggestion. "But I don't want the Empire to trace the comm call and find Kyrimorut that way."

"Ask Mereel to slice into another line and call them through that. Until things go back to normal risk-wise, stay with them. Ask if I can join you there. I'm not going to miss the birth of another of my children... ever."

"I asked if you would be welcome among them during the war. Though they might be wary of your intentions now. When Bardan brings Kad back, I'll help _Kad'ika_ pack his things for an extended stay away."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? I can do that."

"Just because I'm pregnant, it doesn't make me some fragile invalid," she chided. "There's something you can do, though. Ask _Kal'buir_ if we can borrow _Aay'han _for the trip."

"Okay. What are the others going to do if the Empire comes calling while we have _Aay'han_, though?"

"I hope I'm wrong, and that there's nothing to worry about. But if something does happen, there are other ships they can use. And that's jumping over the blaster shot before it's fired... First, Kal has to agree that we can borrow it. "

Just as Darman reached for the door, there was a knock from the other side. Bardan was there, carrying Kad. His green armor creaked. He had been preparing to knock again when Darman opened it. As it was, he barely managed to avoid knocking on Dar, accidently, instead. "_Su'cuy, ner vod. _You're in a better mood today."

"Yeah, I am." Darman bent down to look his son in the eyes. "_Ad'ika_, I'm going to ask _Ba'buir _if I can use something, but Mama wants you to stay here for a minute and help her. Will you do that for me; be a big boy?"

Looking back at Darman, a solemn expression on his small face, especially in his dark eyes, Kad nodded once.

"Good boy, son... Thanks; _vore._" Darman smiled at his little boy, and watched a smile cross Kad's own dark, olive toned features.

Etain called Kad over toward her. She was on the opposite side of the room from Bardan, Darman and Kad. Kad plopped onto his hands and knees on the floor, then crawled over to join her, making her giggle a little. "You're just a bit lazy today, aren't you, _ad'ika_? I know you can walk that far."

Then she explained to Kad what she wanted his help with. "We're going on a trip. Will you put the toys you want to take somewhere away from your other toys for me, sweetheart? We're going to be away for your nameday, so while we're waiting for _Buir_ to come back, he'll be asking for the things your uncles want to give you."

Kad nodded solemnly.

"Thank you, _Kad'ika_." She looked back toward the door to see that Bardan and Darman had already left. _Oh, well I'll just tell Dar when he gets back, then_, she thought.

...

"Dar, is Etain expecting again?" As soon as the men were out of earshot from the room, Bardan took the chance to ask.

"Yes. Was that what offended her so completely yesterday, your suspicion?"

"I think so, at least going by when she stopped cooperating. I went to probe her for pregnancy, one of the few things Gilamar wasn't planning to use the blood test for, and she completely shut me out."

"And checking for Force ability would have been an exercise in redundancy. Everyone here knows about her abilities. And since Kad's Force-sensitive, it's more than likely that the baby will have them too. At least if Force skill is hereditary." Darman stopped speaking long enough to draw Bardan's attention. "_Et'ika_'s worried about you,_ ner vod._ She said that Vader's gunning for you two in particular."

"They _are_ inherited. There was an Order that relied entirely on families for their recruiting in the Corellian sector... Why would he be looking for me? I haven't been a Jedi since just after Kad was born."

"She doesn't seem to think that would make a difference to him."

Bardan was eager to get off of the subject of the largest threat to Force users since the beginning of the Jedi Order. "Do you know if the baby's a boy or girl yet?"

"Etain thinks it's a girl. I'm waiting to see if she's right."

"Well, it's one for one so far... She was right about Kad. So, do you have a name in mind, _vod'ika_, or will you wait until she's born?"

"Callista. If Etain's right about the baby being a girl, that's the name she'll have. If she made a mistake, I'll choose a name when the baby's born."

"Do you think this baby will be born while you're gone?"

"Does it rain on Kamino?"

"In other words, yes. I'll put a portable fetal heart monitor in the _Aay'han _if _Buir _lets you borrow it. After the near loss of _Kad'ika_, you can't be too careful."

"_What?" _Darman's shock would have been obvious, even to the extremely Force blind.

_"Osik_. Did I say more than I was supposed to, again?" Bardan had also mentioned Etain's first pregnancy to one of Kal's former fellow training sergeants before anyone else was ready for the man to find out, and had gotten into heaps of trouble with Kal for it. "I seem to have a penchant for sticking my foot in my mouth. I thought you knew."

"Well I do now, obviously, but you might want to tell me the whole thing."

"You know that after the mission on Coruscant, Etain went to Qiilura, and you know why now. While she was there, she had some trouble forcibly removing some farmers who she and Zey had helped arm to fight the Seps. They planted some mines to trip up her efforts and she lost men, a lot of them. The stress from the mission, and the imprint that those troopers made leaving their bodies, was almost too much for the unborn Kad to take, and at three months premature, there was little chance he'd survive at all if he were born right then. So _Kal'buir_ arranged to have Ordo pick her up and bring her to Doruuma, and from there, to _Manda'yaim. _ She spent the rest of the pregnancy here and on bed rest. On Doruuma, I told Vau that Etain was pregnant, but I thought he already knew. One week after Kad's birth, she took him to _Coruscanta_ to show him off to the clan... You and your squad mainly."

"The rest I _do_ know."

"Right now, Callista's under threat from a major and instantaneous loss of life, the same thing that Sith specialize in. It's not only the threat Palpatine poses to Etain and Kad you have to guard against." Bardan's warning had Darman hanging on every word.

"Is Etain safe to move, as in long space trip?"

"Assuming what she told you about Vader is accurate, and I have no reason to believe it's not, it's probably safer to move her than not." The conversation stopped as the two men entered the main living area. Kal sat in the dining room, helmet off, looking ready to filet someone. "Maybe now's not a good time to ask whether you can take _Aay'han _for a joyride." Bardan heard Darman mutter something under his breath about Kad, Callista, and understatement.

Half deaf or not, Kal could still react to the movement of those around him faster than many of the fully sensory endowed. _"Su'cuy, ad'ike._ Did you want something?"

Bardan was impressed by how quickly Kal could transition from wanting, _needing_ to kill, to normal father.

"Yeah, _buir_. I want something." Darman said, grabbing the opening Kal gave him. "Etain wants to take an extended trip; can we borrow _Aay'han_?"

"Where does she want to take my ship?" Kal's question was accompanied by the hint of two things in his tone, suspicion and challenge.

"She wants to visit some friends of hers from the war." Darman's ire rose at what he perceived as a challenge to his wife.

"How are you sure they can be trusted?"

"They're not exactly on speaking terms with the Empire, either, _Buir._ And Etain's worried about staying here for the next few months. With the garrison practically knocking on our door, I don't blame her."

"Well, don't keep me in suspense, son. Who is she thinking of taking my ship to go and visit?"

Bracing himself for the anticipated outburst, Darman took a breath and let it out, as he'd seen Jedi do to calm their nerves hundreds, if not thousands, of times, before breaking the full impact of the request on his father. "There's a Jedi sect still relatively intact after Order 66, _Buir._ Etain made some friends in it during the last few months of the war. Apparantly, this satellite group condones marriage, so we won't be given any grief, and she won't receive that stupid lecture on attachment again."

"Is _Kad'ika _going, too, if I let you use it?" Kal's tone told Darman not to get his hopes too high.

"Uh-huh, he is. He and Etain are packing his things right now."

"And you think I'm about to let you take my grandson into the rancor's den? I was almost ready to give in before you told me that. Now, my answer is, `I'll think about it.'"

"Hmm, what ever happened to `you're big boys now. _Men_,'" Darman emphasized the word, maybe a little too much, "`who are fully _capable_ of protecting your families?' Or didn't you mean that? Was it just another of those comforting _lies_, told to console a child who throws a temper tantrum?"

Deciding that it was a good time to intervene before Darman lost his temper again, Bardan stepped forward to place a restraining, comforting hand on Darman's upper arm, and suggested, "Take a walk... _Udesii, ner vod._" Cool it, brother. "Relax. I'll help you try to talk him into letting you and your family go. But I'd strongly advise you to regain your composure before trying to re-join Etain. Otherwise, she might not let you back in the room until you do."

A sentiment Darman fully understood, even if he didn't like it. Nevertheless, he didn't have much to lose by following Bardan's advice, and literally everything to lose by ignoring it.

...

"_Kad'ika_, let's go see Uncle Mereel about a talk with some friends of mine." Etain said when she and her son were fully packed.

"'kay, _Boo._ Pick up. Carr'"

"Not now, son. Wait for daddy to come back."

"Wan' ride. Wan' pickie." Kad's whining beg was really getting on his mother's already overworked nerves, although she strove to keep her hard-won patience.

In as calm a tone as she could manage, she explained, "Kad, if I have to carry you, daddy won't be happy. He wants you to walk on your own. Do you remember what he said about being a big boy?"

"'ep."

"Big boys don't need carried. Big boys walk where they go."

"Too bik. No wan' be dat bik 'et."

_He thinks by being as cute as he can, he can talk me out of making him walk._ The realization made Etain take a different tactic with him. "Do you want to hurt me, son? Because if I have to carry you, I'll be hurting myself."

"_Naa, boo._"

"Good. Please don't ask again."

Kad frowned and looked like he would cry, but said, "'Kay."

Ready, now to prove himself a big boy for real, Kad nonetheless took his mother's hand as she left the room. After all, he did still need his mommy for the security she provided. As long as his hand was in hers, he knew his nightmare wasn't real.

...

When Etain and Kad entered the room down the same hall where the techs, Mereel, Jaing, and Atin were working to set up a long range comm station, the three were connecting cables on the console trying to boost a signal. Atin looked up first.

"_Su'cuy, ner vod._ What do you want?"

"Haven't you boys gotten your toy to work yet?"

"No. This thing isn't turning on."

"Can you set a commtap up when you do get it working and call me on my comlink, Atin_?_"

Half-shrugging by tilting his head to enable his ear to touch his shoulder, the scarred former Republic Commando answered, "Sure. Once it works, it shouldn't be any trouble to set up a commtap. Is there anyone in particular you want to call?"

"An alternative _Jetii _group's emergency frequency. One the Imps haven't found yet."

"I thought you were cutting all ties with them." Jaing reminded her.

"Coruscant's, or what's left of them. Not the alternative Orders." Etain's answer caused Atin to snort in derision.

"Next thing we know, you'll be answering to General _shab'la_ Yoda all over again."

"If Yoda's still alive, he can kiss my _shebs_, _At'ika_."

...

Darman went back to the room to pack his own things. Bardan's suggestions made sense in light of everthing else he'd said, but the former Jedi had always been that way... practical. Etain had a lot of secrets, apparently. Finding out that Kad had nearly been still-born, or born already dead, frightened Darman beyond anything he'd ever experienced. That was the risk one ran getting a Jedi pregnant. He swore that he would do whatever it took for Callista to be born safe and healthy within his own power. He owed his child that much. He owed any more children he and Etain had together that much. After that, Darman was amazed that Kad wasn't developmentally impaired or some other _osik._

His clothes, most of them GAR issue, were easy to tell apart from Etain's, which were mostly hand-me-down from either Besany or Laseema. Force forbid the Empire use those to track him. Etain's voice reached him from the hallway, Kad's voice, which Darman knew without seeing his son, breaking up his mother's.

"... Got the ball from _Ba'vodu Bard'ika._"

"No. Ma-ma bing baw for _me._" Kad's tone of voice made him sound like a spoiled child, petulent and demanding.

"If we find it before we leave, Kad. If not, we'll have to leave without it."

"Wiw dare be uder kids to pwa widh?"

"Maybe, _ad'ika_." They entered the room to find Darman waiting there with a kiss for his wife after turning her around, running his hand gently, lovingly across her stomach from behind as he finished. "Oh. Very nice, _Dar'ika. Jatne'buir._"

His voice was husky when he said, "I hope I can be as good as you made me sound for as long as I can."

"_Jatne _kisser, too._._" Her flirting was starting to turn up his perception of being very, _very_ hot and not just from embarassment.

"Can we go now?" Darman's question made Etain smile.

"I was ready for a while. So was Kad."

"Did you get in touch with your friends?"

"Yes, they're waiting in the outer system now."

"Well, that was fast."

"They weren't far away. Their intel was as good as my own, and telling them the same thing mine was."

With intel one never could tell when it was stand alone, but with corroborating reports, it became slightly more believable.

Another knock on the door found Bardan once again on the other side.

Kad tilted his head to look at his uncle. "Baw?"

"I don't have one, _Kad'ika."_ Bardan walked to the center of the room after Darman moved to the left to admit him. "But if you want, I can look for one while you're gone."

"I must be missing something. When I left you and _Buir_ behind, it didn't look good for going anywhere." Darman paused for a moment before asking,_ "Am_ I missing something?"

"After you left, I talked _Buir_ into letting you borrow _Aay'han_ on the condition of either you or Etain staying with Kad at all times."

"I wasn't planning to abandon him there, _Bard'ika,_" Darman pointed out irritably.

...

Outside Kyrimorut

The _Aay'han _was prepped for take-off thanks to Parja by the time the three of them left the main house. Saluting as the small group took off, she told them over the cockpit speakers "If you don't come back safe, I'll kick your _shebs, vode."_

"See you later, Parja." Etain's answer was laced with humor. "Don't worry about your nephew, either. We'll make sure he comes back intact."

"If something happened to _Kad'ika_, it wouldn't be me you have to worry about, _dar'jetii_. Fi would kick your _shebs_, instead."

Except for Kad, everyone on _Aay'han _chuckled at that. "'Bye, _Parj'ika_. If all goes well, we'll be back in a few months." _With a new clan-member. _Etain held the last part of the conversation off, as she thought that for anyone who knew, who was _meant_ to know, Darman would have told.

"Yes, 'bye, _ner vod._"

With that, _Aay'han_ tilted upwards and sped away, Parja watching until they were nothing but a speck in the sky against the backdrop of the local afternoon star.

...

Onboard_ Aay'han_

0145 hours later

"_Kad'ika_ up, _boo._" Kad's voice moved forward to the pilot's and navigator' s stations, while he remained in the seat that Darman had strapped him into.

_"Ad'ika,_ not yet. Wait until the other ship comes to meet us."

"Speaking of Altis, _C__yar'ika_, shouldn't you call them?"

"Dar, they want us to go to them. If any Coruscant Jedi are left, they're most likely going to be with them."

"If we see Zey, Yoda, or Kenobi, I'll shoot them, myself... No matter that I decided not to follow Order 66, they're the Jedi I always wanted the chance to get a shot at. We're not _shab'la _expendable."

"I don't know, _Dar'ika, _I always thought Zey was nice to you... If we see the others, you'll have to beat me to them. And what of Master `I'm-going-to kill-the-Nulls.'"

"I'd expect Camaas' troops happily shot him in the back in his sleep. That's what I'd have done if I had been assigned as his direct subordinate."

"Bad news... RSD on the case of Altis' Order. We have other problems at the moment, _Dar'ika_." Etain could see the trading of turbolaser fire between a triangular craft and what looked like empty space from a thousand kilometers out. "The Empire hasn't had the time to change all their paint jobs yet. The _Remorseless._" Etain identified the capital ship after a quick glance at the IFF transponder display.

"How do you know it's not a group of war profiteers or mercenary band, _Et'ika?"_

_"_Are you kriffing _kidding _me? A _Star Destroyer_? What corrupt Imp would have the _gett'se _to just hand out SDs like party favors? Palpatine would fry him."

"Maybe it's another group of rogue clones."

"Then why would they be trying to shoot a Jedi transport ship out of space?" Etain's incredulous reply was punctuated by the red flashing of the comlight.

"_Wookiee Gunner_, distress. We are under attack by a Republic Star Destroyer. Repeat: Code 5 distress; we are under sustained attack."

"Transfer your communication lines to the R-392 frequency. I'll have your assistance, or what little I can provide, available in five."

"We copy..."

Etain transfered the communicator equipment to the frequency, herself. A minute later...

"Frequency secure. Who am I talking to?"

"Former Jedi Knight Etain Skirata. Our transport has medical supplies if you need them."

"We _do_ have injuries, some of them serious. We can use the help."

"When you have a relatively safe moment, open your docking bay doors. We'll put ourselves down."

"Understood... Jedi Skirata?"

"Ex. Go ahead."

"Right... Ex. Our life-form readers, including the Jedi who are Living Force sensitive are telling me that there's more than just you on that ship."

"Good sensors." Etain muttered under her breath, rolling her eyes. Then, louder... "That's right. My husband and our son." She risked a look back at Kad to see him sleeping; he'd obviously inherited the laid-back nature from Dar, as Etain's personality was intense.

"Ah, that explains the `ex' part, then." The being on the other end, a female by the sound of it, cursed colorfully. "Our docking bay codes are Helios, Naboo, Corellia, Bespin."

"HNCB, understood. We're waiting at stand-off distance. I don't think this transport, modified though it is, can take on an SD even with help."

"Dock when you're ready. _Wookiee Gunner_, out."

After entering the code and setting it to repeat at ten minute intervals until the end of the battle, Etain settled back in the pilot's seat.

Darman swiveled his chair to face his wife, cradled Etain's face on his cupped right hand after slowly turning her head toward him, the tips of his calloused fingers and thumb gently brushing her earlobes, and ran his other hand through her hair.

She leaned in to the touch, closed her eyes with pleasure caused by his skin rubbing against hers and unconsiously parted her lips for a kiss.

"_Et'ika, cyar'ika, _let's head back to a cabin and see how hot we can make it before your friends beat the _osik_ out of those _dar'vode._" The words were spoken with the huskiness born of long hidden desire.

Again the grin, preditory and eager, from the other day. Letting him lead the way to the bedroom would have been too easy, though she did move from the pilot's station into his lap facing the door between the cockpit and the rest of _Aay'han_, which sat to the stern-end, teasing him with their closeness but still not willing to completely give him anything sexually.

_"Mhi meduini an, cyar'ika._" Darman's breathy tone held the hint of the arousal that Etain could feel through the thin fabric of the flightsuit she wore and his own GAR fatigue unisuit, as well as an implication as far as it went, `I'm warning you, _Et'ika_'. "No more, _ner riduur. _ Either give in completely, or don't give in at all."

In response, she ran her lips up the side of his neck, letting the full weight of her own desire come out.

He tilted his head up to make it easier for her to reach his pulse point.

Just then, the communication indicator flashed for attention once again.

_"Osik,_" Darman cursed with a feral growl. "Just when things were getting good."

"Look at it this way, Dar. When we get on the Altisian Order's Praxeum ship, we're that much closer to finally taking it where it should already have been. Now, are you going to answer it, or should I?"

"Go ahead. They've already spoken to you a few times, and the last time they heard somebody like me speak was someone who was shoving proton torpedoes up their engines."

"Okay... " Flipping the comm system toggle over to open the ship-to-ship frequency, Etain asked which hangar they were going to open, and, upon recieving the response, closed the channel again to shunt that power to the engines. Their craft sped forward instantly, clearing the thousand kilometers between the two ships in a matter of minutes, though with the inertial compensator dialed almost as high as it would go, nobody on _Aay'han _registered feeling the movement.

True to their word, the force field of the hangar around stern-side of _Wookiee Gunner_'s wing was down, allowing _Aay'han_ easy access to docking facillities. Putting her down as gently as they could, Etain and Darman had hardly begun the power-down sequence before the yellow barrier was back in place at the hangar entrance.

As soon as the forcefield was reactivated, Etain rose and headed aft, primarily to open the access hatchway out of the ship. The opening doorway finally revealed the scope of the docking wing that the Skiratas had put down in. It was approximately fifty cubic meters, absolutely_ huge._ Etain spotted a somewhat familiar form standing against the far interior door, the Jedi that her unborn daughter would be named for.

"Etain, how are you?" The other woman was a good four centimeters taller than Etain, and hardly knew her, but like any other all but strangers who had been through a disaster with very few survivors, they had become best friends.

"Hi, Callista. I'm holding myself together... I have to, for my husband and son."

"You're married now, huh?"

"Yeah. What about you? I don't see anything on your finger."

"I'm not married... yet; congradulations, though."

"Yet. Speaking of family, _cyar'ika,_ come on out. I don't think they're a threat because of what you are, Dar." Etain called, looking back at _Aay'han,_ which stood creaking on its landing struts. There was no sign of her husband on or near the landing ramp, so she tried again. "_Dar'ika_, _oya._"

Finally, Darman showed up at the top of the landing ramp, standing there holding a half- awake Kad. Despite Etain's repeated assurances, Darman wasn't entirely sure they could trust these unknown Jedi not to kidnap his son.

Once he reached the bottom of the ramp, Etain walked up to him and rested her head against his chest, her hands wrapped around his left arm. His muscles bunched under his clothing's sleave and made it difficult for her hands to fit around it.

He gazed warily out at the three Jedi and ten civilians scattered around the hangar from under his dark bangs and shifted his grip on his son. Kad stirred but didn't entirely wake up.

"Is that your little boy?" Callista's hushed voice came to Darman's ears as a question directed at Etain, but his instinctive internal alarm was blaring because of who asked the question.

"Yes... The little one is Kad, which means saber in his father's native language. A fitting name, if ever there was one."

"And your name, sir?"

"Darman."

Etain wasn't one to trample on what few rights clone soldiers had, even if they were deserters, so she gave her husband the choice to answer or not. His brusque answer surprised her.

"_Cyar'ika,_ what the _shab_ has gotten into you lately?" Etain's admonishment was enough to bring Darman out of his thunderous mood.

"Sorry, ma'am."

Callista Masana tactfully decided to change the subject. "And from the look of things, you're expecting again."

"Actually, there are some things having to do with that I was meaning to ask you about."

"Ask away."

"Are there any birthing facilities here, with all the families?"

"There's a medbay with a fully stocked birth chamber. It's one of our few areas there that we don't use on a regular basis."

"I had some trouble with Kad. Are they set up for an emergency?"

"This community is completely self-reliant. Our medbay is set up for any situation that might happen. It's been coming in especially handy since Palpatine assumed power."

"Sounds like more _Jetii_ braging to me." Darman muttered, his mistrust of this group of Jedi was not lessened any more than had he been caught at a briefing in Coruscant's Jedi Temple under the same conditions. He was intellectually aware of the differences, but that was as far as that awareness went. He couldn't help but remember Etain's explaination for why he had been kept in the dark about Kad's paternity, a rather obvious worry that the Coruscant Jedi would take him away from them. If she didn't like the life that a combination of fate and genes had selected for her, why would either of them allow Kad to be taken?

Struggling, now, to put a lid on the rising tide of her annoyance, Etain let her irritation be known in the scowl spreading across her features.

"I'm getting the impression you're both tired, and your son obviously is too. How about I show you to the unused room you'll be in for the remainder of your stay?"

Sighing in relief, for Etain was starting to get uncomfortable in more ways than one, she sat down on one of the medbay beds. Her ankles, in particular, were killing her.

"Are you okay, _riduur_?"Darman was all concern.

"I'm fine... Callista, I'm staying on the ship Dar and I came on, at least for the night. What about you, _Dar'ika_?"

"I think I'll stay on the ship, too."

"Your son can stay with one of the other families, or he can stay with you."

"He's staying with us, not just tonight, but every night." Darman again.

"Suit yourself." Callista's answer held a tone of nothing but acceptance.

"Darman, let me carry Kad."

Taking a breath, Darman prepared himself to argue, but remembered at the last minute what Bardan said about stressing a pregnant Etain out. "_Et'ika, riduuruk_ when we get back to _Aay'han_. Swear it. Mean it. And you can carry Kad back there."

_"Ori'haat_... I so swear." Etain took a sleeping Kad from his father, letting his head rest on her shoulder.

...

On _ Aay'han, _primary crew quarters_, _ten minutes later

Kad was in another room, sound asleep. And Darman finally had his wish... a sexually receptive wife who wasn't angry with him or he with her.

Once Etain let her hair down and relaxed into his advances, she thoroughly enjoyed herself.

He had started working her into the mood by turning down the lights in the room as soon as he entered, the last of the two of them to do so. Turned down or not, he left just enough illumination to see by. She had _finally _removed her shirt, though the sleep pants might or might not interfere, depending on whether she was wearing any.

As far as his own clothing went, he had taken off his unisuit before entering the shower, then simply opted not to replace it when he got out, although he did ball it up to put in the washload after sex. Letting the door of the room shut behind him, an anticipatory grin crossing his countenance, for he was savvy enough in matters of pleasuring her, that he knew he could get her up as quickly or slowly as he chose, he crossed the room and lay down on the bed, allowing her to get comfortable against him, before wrapping his arms around her shoulders from behind so that they crossed in front of her chest and clasped together properly, though with room to spare.

_This will be easier than I thought; apparently she isn't wearing any sleep pants either._ He tilted his head down to enable him to plant a gentle kiss on the top of her head, and saw her soft, brunette hair ripple outward with each breath.

He heard her giggle like a nervous school-girl, and peered at her in askance.

"That tickles, _Dar'ika... _the way my hair brushes past my ear when you do that." Her own breathing was becoming quicker, to keep pace with his.

"You know you can't keep going,_ riduur._" He used some of the left over room of his embrace to slowly trace circles of varying sizes on the bare skin of her chest as he said this, and was rewarded by feeling, seeing, by the rising and falling of her chest, and hearing her breath accelerate once again. "Sooner or later, denying this _will_ hurt you."

The words weren't a threat; just an observation, and she knew her husband well enough to take them that way.

As he continued working his way toward drawing her into his ultimate goal, he set aside part of his considerable brainpower for thinking... about her: the first time they met just over three years before was one of the simplest tasks of the war for himself and his squad; his adoptive father's tips about using thoughts of a woman to keep him alive, given on Coruscant just before shipping out again. Though he didn't know at the time, Etain was pregnant with Kad when he'd received that lecture.

_"There are two ways to think about women in wartime, son. One is to obsess over them to the point that it gets you and others killed. The second is to think about them, to focus on them as what you're _really_ fighting for, as a reason to come home again. You know which one of those you'll choose?"_ He and Kal had been alone in an empty room after they, along with Bardan, Vau, the rest of Omega, and some of Vau's trainees, Delta squad, had cleared out the operational safehouse. His squad mates had already been given credits to spend a free day wandering around the planet, but Kal had requested that he stay behind for a few minutes.

_"Yes, buir."_

_"Good."_

And he _had_ used those tips, especially that one.

Kal's lessons about warriors stuck with him, more strongly than the gestation tank brainwashing of the contingency orders had, so Order 66, nightmarish as the night was, didn't end with him shooting Etain.

"Dar...?" Etain's voice always had the power to pull him out of his thoughts, and he looked down to see her green eyes gazing back.

"What, C_yar'ika?_" He held on to her still, though while he thought, his grip had moved from shoulders and chest, to around her ribs, encircling her chest at it's widest point.

"What were you worried about?" Etain could always gauge his mood, sometimes better than he could.

"I wasn't exactly _worried_, just thinking how much worse things could have been." _Never_ lie to a Jedi, yet another thing Kal had taught him. As for his answer, it was an eighty percent truth.

"Order 66?" Etain's knowing expression was enough so he didn't completely break; she had always understood, or she tried to.

"Yeah, among other things." His acknowledgement was accompanied by a small nod.

"Tell me." Her tone left no room for argument.

"The other night, when Kad woke up at Kyrimorut, he told me about a dream he had, where we had gone to _Aay'han_, rather than it picking us up. In the dream, we were crossing a bridge, when a lightsaber ignited in front of us in a tightly pressed crowd of people. The more- than- likely Jedi went for two troopers, cut one down, but you stood in front of the other, protecting him. You held the Jedi off, until something distracted you. While you were looking for it, the Jedi ran you through. Then, in an attempt to get away, he Force pushed one of us over the side. Kad said someone else was there but he couldn't tell who it was, and he thought it was the other person who was pushed."

_So_ that_ was what Dar's dream was about,_ Etain realized. "Sounds like a vision, more than a dream. Only visions remain so vivid after coming out of them."

"He told me about it as we were coming back to the room. Twenty minutes after we left."

"I can't remember ever having a vision, myself. But that might not mean much. Since I didn't want to draw too much attention to us, I didn't do much in the way of research at the Jedi Archives about whether specific Force powers would be passed from one generation to the next based on the last time relationships were allowed in the Coruscant Order."

"Wait just a minute, do you mean they weren't always forbidden?" Darman was shocked by the revelation.

"Apparently not. From what I _did_ manage to piece together, long ago, many of the restrictions that Yoda and the other Council members took as a matter of course weren't set up yet. It was only in the last several thousand years of the Republic that Jedi started shunning relationships. Some hard-nosed Jedi screwed all of those who came after by falling to the Dark Side _while_ romantically involved. The timing was coincedence, but the Council at the time didn't see it that way, and none of those who were named to the Councils after gave it a second thought."

"And, fearing expulsion, most of the lower ranking _Jetiise_ didn't question it either," Darman surmised.

"That was when these alternative Orders started popping up throughout the galaxy; the only thing they consistantly do differently is to allow relationships, not only within their own number but outside, as well. The Altisian Order, this one, was the last to crop up around the time of the Battle of Naboo."

"The time the Republic's army was created."

"Right. Dar, do you think Palpatine was playing the long game, as _Kal'buir _puts it; that he was behind not only the army, but puppetmastering since he first took office?"

"More than one person couldn't have set things up so well. The timing on everything was just too perfect. I think he probably was."

"Why would he have the Seppies, as they were later called, invade his own homeworld, though? It doesn't make sense."

"_Et'ika_, most tyrants need a crisis of some kind to come to, or stay in, power. What better way to gain sympathy for your `cause' than setting up an invasion of your own homeworld? Whoever invades takes the fall, and you come out of it looking like a victim in a worst case scenario, and a hero in the best. Your hands seem clean, but you were working behind the scenes the whole time. The fall-beings enable you to start tightening the freedoms, and until you've squeezed the `free' right out of it, they're your excuse. Say, `hey galaxy, if you don't want this happening to you put me in power, and I promise it won't .'" Darman laughed bitterly. "And as someone created specifically to cause the current mess, I've been used and betrayed for the trouble by almost everyone."

"I know," Etain murmured. She squeezed his arm comfortingly for a few moments, then leaned back to look him in the eyes and added with a small smile, "Well, you can lay here and complain about it, or you can put off thinking about it for another time. I _thought_ there was something you'd rather do, instead..." Etain trailed off, suggestively running her fingers down his side.

Darman's breath caught in his throat from the erotic thrill that Etain's advances were having on him."Well, now that you mention it..."

...

Darman lay on top of her, thrust himself into her over and over again.

Arching her bare, sweat-soaked back, Etain moaned with pleasure, as she wrapped her non-material consciousness around his in the Force, climaxing as Darman reached his own peak by design, heightening the intimate connection with him to the nth degree.

Collapsing from sheer exhaustion, the formerly pristine white sheets tangled in sweat-soaked disarray around most of the lower half of their entwined bodies, Darman rolled Etain over on her side, his left arm draped over Etain's middle, their synchronized breathing came out in ragged gasps as they each tried to catch their breath.

Etain, predictably due to the aid of the Force, got her breathing back to normal first. Darman, who was in reasonably good shape for someone who had been out of the army for four days, and hadn't exactly kept up an aerobic workout routine even while in it, was still not far behind.

At just over a month pregnant, Etain was a far cry from the big as a bantha she remembered herself as while she carried Kad. She looked over at Darman to find him awake but, predictably, completely spent. "Leave it to the Force to have a sence of humor, even if it's very kriffed up sometimes." Etain was thinking that she hadn't been given a single time, in between pregnancies, to have sex with Darman without becoming pregnant again. "We're one of the most fortunate couples in history, but the whole fertility success rate begs the question, if Force-users aren't supposed to be romantically involved, why the _shab_ is it so easy for the female in those relationships to become pregnant? At least, if I'm anything to go by."

"Maybe it doesn't have to do as much with what those involved do, or did, as the fact that we're both in such great shape," Darman pointed out. And it was true; in between pregnancies, Etain had taken great pains for more than one reason, to get back to her pre-baby figure. And Darman had the perfect musculature that even a professional body-builder would envy. Not much, if any, fat stayed on his frame for very long.

Teasingly, Etain said, "That would be no real thanks to your eating habits, _Dar'ika._ I have absolutely no idea how much _Kal'buir_ spent on sweets during the war, but I'd be willing to bet it went into the thousands. Especially given how much he had me carting around on visits to his and other troops in the field."

"No fat on me to show for it, either. Unlike some clone soldiers I knew, or know. Fi, for example; he's gained a few kilos since Gaftikar."

"Hmmm. Must be all that Mando cooking. Parja's aunt Rav has some delicious meals. Not that I could stuff myself with much by the time Kad was born."

"I wonder if someone stocked the galley before we left; it'll be awhile before we have any _uj_ cake after Callista's born if not."

"Ah, celebratory. Assuming, of course, that you don't eat it all yourself, Dar." Etain's point was made with a teasing grin.

"Not funny, _Et'ika." _He tried to maintain a scowl, but it didn't last long. Sighing, Darman fought against the impulse to laugh. And lost. "As a matter of fact, and contrary to popular belief, we _can_ hold ourselves back when confronted with a sweet snack. It was the tinnies, and is, for those of us who deserted, the _dar'vode_ stormtroopers who need to watch out."

"You should sit back and let the younger beings who want to fight the Empire get their shot."

"_Et'ika_, I'm not that old... Coming up on my fourteenth lifeday chronologically. For all intents and purposes, I'm twenty-seven. Still young enough to put up a good fight." He saw her bite her lower lip, and thought he knew what was troubling her. "Hey," he said gently, comfortingly, after taking her hand in his own. "_Kal'buir_ will find that accelerated aging cure. I believe, even with everything going on, that he'll have it ready by the time we get back to Kyrimorut."

"It's not only that, _cyar'ika._ If my intel is right, Vader knows some Coruscant Jedi survived. That will cause him to follow every lead he gets. I can't say that I'm as trusting of all the _Mando'ade_ coming and going from Kyrimorut at all hours of the day and night as your _vode _are. I can't help but see each of them as nothing more than a security risk."

"Do you trust me to protect Kad and Callista, when she's born?"

"Of course I do, Dar. But only from an attack from a non-Force sensitive. Vader's a whole new level of opponent. Commandos didn't have the chance to face Count Dooku, and to be honest, neither did I. I do know, however that very few Jedi who faced him emerged from the confrontation alive, and even fewer came out intact. From all I've heard, Vader's worse than Dooku _ever_ was."

"Would you trust me against another commando?"

"One on one, or even one on four? You could defeat them, easily, especially since you have something worth fighting for. All they have is a misplaced sence of loyalty. But one against what's left in the Empire's special forces...no one''s that good."

"Sometimes, a misguided sence of loyalty is enough, _cyar'ika_... But it always helps to have either superior numbers or the element of surprise. The only one of those _we _have is the element of surprise. If the Empire _does _attack Kyrimorut while we're gone, they'd have all three."

"Or if they dropped a bomb, carrying the nano-virus Uthan was working on when you lot caught up with her, on Mandalore at any time. That's what _I'd _be worried about; after all, while we have Uthan, the Empire has her work."

"_Et'ika, _I'm sure _some_one at Kyrimorut have their ear to the ground; they'll have some warning before the bomb is dropped on their collective head." Darman's fingers trailed slowly along her hairline and back to trace her left earlobe, the action serving the double intention of flirting with her and pushing some of her long hair back behind that ear, then down her throat.

"If they're forced to leave before we get back, for whatever reason, I don't know that I'll be able to tell Kyrimorut's been abandoned before leaving _Aay'han_." Her breathy whisper was all the incentive he needed to wrap his leg over her knee in a position that, had they been standing and had he been so inclined, he could have tripped her up. Of course, he had neither the capability, given their horizontal position, nor the inclination to hurt her. Not now; not ever again, if he could help it.

"_Et'ika, listen_ to me. _Kal'buir_ told me when I asked to borrow _Aay'han_ to call Kyrimorut when we were on our way back. If there's no answer, there's the fallback in Hutt space to hide out until we do find them."

"What did we get for the tr-?"

"Ma...? Da...?" Kad's voice came to them through the doorway, confused and scared. They had temporarily jambed both ship's cabin doors open when they had placed him in bed. He was in an unfamiliar set of surroundings, and could sense the strangers outside. He could tell that there were Force-users nearby.

Groaning, Darman removed his arm from around Etain's neck as he rolled over and went to get up. "Every kriffing time..."

"Dar, I'll get him." Etain rolled over and pulled the covers off of herself. Deliberately, Etain got out of bed and sashayed over to the wardrobe to grab a nightgown, then looked back over her shoulder apologetically one more time, before leaving the room.

...

Kad's temporary quarters, _Aay'han,_ two minutes later

Down the hallway, Etain sat by her son's bed, gently rubbing comforting circles on his back. "Shhh, sweetheart. You're okay."

Kad sniffled, having been crying when his mother walked in.

Etain could feel her son's fear and was desperate to alleviate it. But, first, she had to find out what had caused it. "Son, what are you afraid of? I'm right here. I promise, you're safe."

He crawled onto her lap and curled against her, wiping his tears on her shirt. "Bad dream, _boo._"

Etain felt the jolt of recognition, and suddenly realized why the Force had pushed her to comfort her son in his father's place. "Was it the same one that woke you up the other night, _Kad'ika?_"

His brown eyes, so like Darman's, looked into her green ones, trusting her words, and he nodded. "Ep, _boo._"

"Son, does it look like I'm hurt? Does it _feel_ like I'm hurt?"

"No." His simple answer was said through pursed lips. He clutched a handful of her loose hair in his small fist, as though he thought that if he let go, she would disappear.

"I'm safe, and so are you. Do you believe me?"

"Ep."

"_Ad'ika, _if I bring you into the room with Daddy and me, do you think you'll have the bad dream again?"

"No."

"Right; come on, then." She grunted the last word as she scooped him up onto her hip. She headed back down the hallway, Kad in her arms. She slipped back to the room where she and Darman slept; placing Kad on the bed, she pulled the covers back up over her shoulders gripping the blankets from underneath. while Kad snuggled between her and his father, leaning more against her as a form of self-assurance, a way to know that she was still alive.

Humming a lulaby that she had heard long ago in the Jedi Temple, Etain ran her hand through her son's hair until she heard his soft breathing slow. She knew that Kad was asleep.

"_Et'ika,"_ Darman's whisper caught her off-guard. "Put _Kad'ika_ back in bed."

"Shh, _Dar'ika_; let him stay, just for tonight. He needs one night of sleep where he's reassured constantly that I'm still alive." Etain's answer caused Kad to stir. Turning her attention back to Kad, she let him use her arm as a pillow as she soothed him back to sleep.

"_Riduur,_ you don't have to let him sleep in our room to have him sleep through the night, especially on _Aay'han_, somewhere he's slept hundreds of times before."

_"_That's not the point, Dar. He had the vision again. I figured that if he sleeps with us, he'll realize that there's nothing to worry about, and he'll be able to sleep through the night again in his own bed." One of the times she let her fingers brush across her son's forehead, Etain noticed something. "Dar, is it just me, or does he feel hot to you, too?"

Putting his wrist where his wife's fingers had just vacated and letting it rest there, Darman couldn't hide the alarm in his expression. "Yeah, he does. No wonder he's been so tired lately. He's sick." Reaching out over the side of the bed, grabbing the medisensor they had brought along with them he handed it to his wife, Darman then wrapped his hand around his son's shoulder as loosely as he could. Gently shaking his son awake, Darman said, "Come on, _ner ad'ika_. Wake up."

Kad's eyes slowly opened in response to his father's voice.

"Son, open your mouth, please."

Obediently, Kad let his mouth open up, and Etain stuck the thermometer-like instrument under his toungue.

Kad made a face, and Etain sensed that he was thinking about spitting it out. "Son, this might taste funny, but you need to keep it in your mouth until daddy tells you to open up again. Understand?"

"'Ep, _'oo_." A toddler trying to talk was hard enough under normal circumstances, but with an awkward (and bad tasting) shape sticking out of Kad's mouth... For_get_ it.

After a minute, the three of them heard a small beep.

"Okay, son. Open up." Darman held his hand out, and the scanner dropped into it. Looking at the digital display, Darman's black eyebrow rose, and Etain could tell that he was even more concerned by what he saw.

"What's wrong?" Etain's concern was etched on her face, with a raised brow indicating the curiosity which was warring for dominance with the worry in her gaze.

"Kad's definately running a fever," her husband answered. Looking at Kad, he asked, "Does anything hurt, son?"

"Owie? 'Ep." Little hands brushed across his head, as he tried to show his father where he was hurting.

"Your head?" Etain asked, letting him cuddle even closer to her, his face burrowing into her nightgown's sleave.

Giving his head a slow nod, Kad moved closer still, hoping his head didn't start hurting more. Fortunately, he didn't notice any extra pain.

Taking Kad and rolling him over, Darman pulled the covers off of himself to leave the bed. He put his burgandy fatigues back on, taking his son in his arms as he stood before walking over to the door. "Call your friend, _Et'ika._ Tell her what's going on, and ask her to have a med-team standing by." He spoke quickly, the only outward indication of his concern for his son.

"Okay." Pulling her comlink from the nightstand, Etain made the requested call. "Callista? It's Etain... I don't know; What I _do_ know is that my son has a slight fever. Can you have a team standing by in the medbay?... Darman will be bringing him out. I'll be there in three hours to take over from him."

"Etain, I'll see the 'bay's ready for him, myself. And get in touch with our healers, Jedi and regular medics." Callista's reply came back, not showing a trace of tiredness in her voice or Force-presence that Etain could decern.

"Thanks, Callista. Etain, out."

Darman's brisk pace was slow enough that he wouldn't jostle his son; his steps carried him down the lowered landing ramp, across the hangar, and along the path to the healers' ward of the modified Praxeum ship.

...

True to her word, Darman had to give her that, Callista had the medbay ready by the time he brought his son in, his memory of the last two times he had been in something similar coming and going from his conscious thoughts. "Before he passed out, he was complaining of a headache, and I didn't object to Etain's description of `slight fever', simply because I didn't want to worry her. In reality, his temperature is almost high enough to kill him. As his father, I do have one request: no med droids. I couldn't trust them before, and I trust the things even less now. One of them tried to kill my brother. And I wouldn't trust the Empire as the thing recharges not to slice in and discover that he has Force abilities."

"We have more than enough organic medics that it won't be a problem. And I fully understand the fear of discovery, though I admit my own worry is based less on full `family' discovery, and more about the community."

"In a way, ma'am, that _is _your family," Darman pointed out, laying Kad on one of the room's beds as he said that.

"I've always pitied your wife for being raised by someone besides her parents. That's where most versions of the Jedi differ from Coruscant's. Where Coruscant eschewed relationships of any kind, the others encouraged them, no matter what form they took."

"Sounds like you're recruiting." Darman's tone was neutral, but the Jedi noticed that his posture had stiffened, belying the way that his words were spoken.

"Not at all. After all, we're unwilling to impose the life of a Jedi on anyone. Unlike Coruscant, we don't engage in kidnapping, either."

Seeing Callista's sincerity in her grey-eyed gaze, Darman relaxed slightly. "It looks like your variant is the most intact for it, too."

"We did lose a few, all of whom were on Coruscant or Corellia when it all went down. But we didn't lose as many as we could have." The Jedi's openness stunned the former commando, and he turned to face her, only to realize that _she _was already looking in his direction.

Reguarding him silently for a moment, Callista debated whether or not to bring up a question that had been on her mind since Etain had told them that Darman would be joining her on the _Wookiee Gunner_. Finally, deciding to risk it, she asked, "Why did you disobey?"

"Etain was the only Jedi in the area, and she made a point of treating us with respect; not all Jedi did that, and those who didn't were painting a target on their backs." He answered without hesitation or any descernable emotion, almost as if he were answering a commanding officer in the field. He had obviously given it some thought after the fact.

"Let's say that Yoda had been somewhere nearby. Would you have tried to shoot him?"

"Well, as he had issued an order for Etain and another commando squad to abandon an MIA member of Special Forces, I'd certainly have considered him a target of opportunity. Given some of Etain's expressed opinions of Yoda's command style as the war continued, I don't think she would have been too upset with me had I killed him."

"Was she really that anti-Coruscant Order?"

"Not so much, ma'am. Anti-Corrie Order policy; that would be more accurate. The Jedi themselves...," Darman took a deep breath before explaining farther, "her problem with them was more about them not kicking up a stink about the way my brothers and I were treated than the beings themselves, especially those who served as role models for the Order. A role model, if someone deserves the title, belongs to those who live their alleged beliefs, not to those who hold a position simply through their age."

Reaching out a hand toward the unconscious Kad, Callista's gaze softened. "I've always wanted a child of my own, but the closest I've come is to take on care for an orphan with my fiance`."

"Being a parent is an amazing thing, though dealing in a normal way with a child is hard for someone who was never given a normal childhood themselves."

"Are you talking about your wife, or yourself?"

After briefly thinking the question over, Darman answered, "A little of both, I think."

"Very few clones were vocal critics of the way any of you were treated."

"Well, I was almost killed by two other troopers, so I kind of understand why not. They mistook me for a pre-existing deserter. A pre-_Geonosis_ deserter."

"So they left from Kamino? How did he manage that?"

"My former training sergeant thinks he had help on the inside... That one of the other `dead men' arranged for him to disappear."

Darman had paused in his explanation, giving Callista the incentive to draw her own conclusion. "But you're not sure."

"Well, for beings who chose to isolate themselves from any contact with the outside galaxy for a decade, they had a lot of supplies coming and going from Kamino. It wouldn't surprize me if Fett was paid by another sergeant to go out of his way to turn a blind eye away from an extra passenger on a supply run." Darman hesitated. "On the other hand, where would he have been hidden between the time the decision was made and the time the supply run left? If the Kaminoans or any of the sergeants that didn't really care what happened to us found him before he was rescued, he would have faced a fate worse than being shot up on a battlefield, or being killed by a brother or two... he would have been given a lethal injection and nobody would ever have talked about him again. For a Mandalorian trained trooper or commando, there are fates much worse than death."

"Your reluctance to pick a side... is that a throw-back to the GAR?"

"More like a throw-back to Kamino. But, if the threat the Empire poses to Etain and Kad becomes more immediate, I won't shed a tear over the brothers I have to kill to protect them. I know where my loyalty lies. Besides, Mandalorians like to know what is what , is where before choosing a side."

"Wars have a nasty tendancy to pit brother against brother, sometimes more literally than others."

"Maybe, but from training with a Mando whose daughter worked for the Seps it has given me some unique perspectives on family members shooting each other up. Mandalorians, which is what I always considered myself, do that a lot. To pick a side contrary to their own family isn't as awkward for us as it would be for most cultures. We value our families, but aren't afraid to shoot them. Especially if they're threatening the family members that matter more."

"I have to admit, the idea of prioritizing family isn't much different than what Coruscanti Jedi did, as much as they claimed to dislike attatchments they were also taught to see each other as the only family they'd ever need; that little bit of expectation contradiction has always confused me."

"Not all of them were the same."

"Etain never pretended she was our group's superior, morally or otherwise. But surely you noticed that she was the exception, rather than the norm."

"I won't lie and say I didn't. She always told my squad that we mattered to her, and unlike the rest of her kind, she never gave us any reason to doubt it." Darman reached out to his son and ran his fingers gently through the boy's hair. "_Koy'acyi, ad'ika,"_ he whispered. Stay alive, son.

The look on his face, caring and worried, told Callista enough of what Darman meant that she put her hand compassionately on his shoulder, even if she did have to reach upward to do so. "Given the survival ability you both showed, I think he'll be fine, Darman."

_Did she really mean that_, Darman wondered, turning to look at the Jedi directly. _Or was she just saying what she thought I wanted to hear_? Seeing that her compassion wasn't just in her voice, he knew that she meant the whole thing, every last word. "Thanks, ma'am... I only hope you're right."

...

Etain was on her way to replace Darman by their son's bedside when she heard conversation from the room that Altis' medbay was in. As she drew closer, she began to catch first, syllables, then words, and finally, by the end, whole sentances.

The only whole sentance she heard was her husband saying `I only hope you're right.' She entered the medbay, ready to suggest that he get some rest. "Dar, having it out with the _aruetii_ isn't the best way to make friends." Nodding to her friend in dismissal and watching Callista leave, she took the other Jedi's place, letting her head rest against her husband's chest while gazing half-worried, half-loving at Kad. "How is he, Dar?"

Shifting slightly to better accommodate her, he answered. "Sleeping. I keep hoping he'll wake up; that he'll be okay. Your friend was in here trying to comfort me. I don't know if it worked that well, though."

"Darman, you hold out hope even now. When you left, you were panicking. I could _feel_ it; even from a distance. I'd say whatever she told you worked to calm you down, at least a little."

Shrugging as much as their positions in relation to each other allowed, he said, "Maybe. Then again, maybe I was just shut down emotionally, like I was for a while after you finally admitted you made me a father. This time, so my son couldn't feel my fear."

"How _did_ you find out how to obstruct my Force connection to you, anyway, _cyar'ika_? We can't always shut each other out."

"Sergeant Vau. Think of a traditional school, and that's what we did on Kamino, basing tier, or grade, on our physical age, all the way up to nine chronological years."

"Eighteen years." Etain guessed after a quick math estimate, based on what little she understood of accellerated aging.

Nodding, Darman continued, "Three months were all the free time the oldest of us, like Ordo and his squad, had before shipping out to Geonosis."

Sighing at the enormity of the task that her husband's adoptive father set for himself, Etain let her head fall to Darman's lap. Feeling his rough fingers being drawn through her hair, she gazed sideways as much as she could to be able to see him out of her peripheral vision.

"Did I startle you, _Et'ika_?"

"No. That feels good, though... comforting in a way." Etain reassured him, convincing him to keep going.

"_Cyar'ika_. Do you feel anything with Kad?"

"No. I'd try healing him myself if I had any skills in that area, and if I didn't think I'd be doing more harm than good by trying_."_

"You're stronger for admiting what you _can't _do than what you can,_ ner riduur._" Darman pointed out, his wife turning to face him on his lap, rather than their son, whom she _knew _to be in more serious condition than her husband let on. Etain, after all, was far from stupid herself. No _Mando'ad_ worth anything would marry someone who was a complete _di'kut_.

"That means I feel absolutely helpless." Etain's shoulders began shaking, and tears started to form in her sea-green eyes as she struggled to contain the sobs threatening to choke her on their way past her lips.

"Hey, _Et'ika_, you're okay, and Kad will be. I'm sure of it... and you should be, too." Besides the normal durasteel medbay beds, there was a loveseat couch by a viewport not too far from their son's bed for visiting family to take naps while their loved one was being treated, and a regular L-shaped couch opposite it. "C'mon, _Et'ika_, at least _try_ to sleep. You're in no condition to stay awake for much longer."

Etain could detect a little worry in his voice. "Of course, Darman." Walking over to the bed where their son lay, Etain brushed his darkened hair back over his head. Reaching out to the Force, Etain sent into Kad's fevered, unconscious form comforting thoughts of safety; of home. _Son, I promise I won't be far._

In a brief moment of mental lucidity, Kad sent back, _Ma-ma, it hurts._

_I know, son. I won't be going anywhere out of this room until you're okay._ Pulling gently away from contact, both mental and physical with her son, Etain allowed Darman to guide her across the room to lay down, Darman holding her right hand the whole way. "Dar, Kad needs _one _of us nearby in case he wakes up."

"Think positive; it's not _in case_, it's for when. And we will be. _Both_ of us."


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

_"Come anywhere near me or my child, and I'll show you just how much I embraced the peace and serenity they tried to teach me at the academy."_

-Etain Tur-Mukan to former Kaminoan Chief Scientist Ko Sai

Kyrimorut, Mandalore

480 days After the Battle of Geonosis

...

**Author's note: ***_* is Force communication, or non-verbal communication translations _Italics _is ship names, _Mando'a, _chapter quotes,thoughts during the current time of the story, or memory. Normal writing is story proper or thoughts\sarcasm during memory. This applies for the rest of the fic. Some of my readers might disagree with me, and have in previous chapters about the specific class of ship_Wookee Gunner_is, but the Corellian corvette is the closest type of ship to the limited description I managed to find. My apologies in advance, but I'm keeping it that way.

A warning in advance: There is a bit of Star Wars EU\Saga-based stronger language in this chapter... possibly making the chapter T-rating. But, then, the fic is already an M in it's entirety. Also, this chapter has been broken up into pieces for posting. It's length is now in three pieces, and will likely include more by the end of posting, but storyline-wise, it still equals between 24 and 26 hours.

I'm _so_ sorry this chapter wasn't posted sooner, but a situation arose that wouldn't even allow me to get on the 'net.

**Disclaimer: **Not mine, this time not even the quote, which came from "Republic Commando: True Colors" by Karen Traviss.

...

10 days after Order 66

Modified Corellian Corvette and Altisian Order's Praxeum ship _Wookiee Gunner,_ medical bay

...

"_Et'ika_..." Darman took advantage of the fact that he and his wife were, however temporarily, alone- aside from three activated med droids and two human med staff who were more or less ignoring them, to shift himself on the couch and wrap his arms around her waist.

"I'd be willing to stay with _Kad'ika_ if you want, and you can go back to _Aay'han _to freshen up." In the past week, they had occasionally switched back and forth to leave the medbay every few days in shifts.

As the hangar where _Aay'han _was docked wasn't far away, Etain hadn't felt exceptionally guilty in leaving Kad behind in medbay while she took her showers, even though she had repeatedly broken her promise to stay in the room. But, or so she had reasoned, Dar was there watching out for him.

While she wanted to get into a nice warm shower, even more so than usual, she was reluctant to leave. Something, whether it was normal insight or the Force, was telling her that Kad would be waking up very soon and come Corellian Hells or high water, she was determined to be there for him when he did so.

"I want to see if _Kad'ika_ wakes up, before I leave this morning." Etain's response was given while she snuggled even closer against him, tilting her head up and around for a kiss.

Deigning, for convenience's sake alone, to kiss the top of wife's head, the kiss pressing her hair gently against her scalp, instead of the lips to lips contact that she had expected. He thought, for the millionth time at least since first encountering her more than three years ago, how beautiful she was, and how lucky _he_ was to have her.

Although he knew from experience, if he were to compliment her, that she would deny whatever he said, especially if he were to mention her looks. Not in the manner of `you don't know what you're talking about' which would accompany a typical denial, but meaning `I'm not really as pretty as you think I am'.

Sighing, she let her head rest against her husband's shoulder. "What is it, _Dar'ika_? Are the memories haunting you again?"

"No. I was just thinking." The answer given with a sad smile. Then as though the sadness had never been there, a pride-filled gaze flickered across his face as he ran his hand gently through Etain's long hair, then down the side of her face, fingers brushing most slowly past her ear and causing her breath to catch in her throat. Shifting again, allowing himself the easiest access to her stomach so far that morning, Darman's hand moved, seemingly of it's own accord, to rest there, feeling the muscles tensing and relaxing repeatedly under the consistent pressure of his hand.

Changing the subject, his voice was deep when he asked what he had been wondering. "Do you think the baby will look more like you or me when she grows up?"

"I don't know. Genetics isn't starship mechanics, and even if it were, I'm not a mechanic."

Pretending she didn't feel anything, as a result of the pressure, or hear the rumbling sound of his speech against her ear through the borrowed clothing he wore, would have been more effective if they weren't laying against each other. As it was, he felt the effect it had on her... "Dar, please, not now." She murnured as she tried to move away just a little, but was prevented from going farther by his arms, which tightened more when he realized what she was trying to do,

"Careful, _Et'ika._ Don't fall off the couch," he admonished, a loving smile gracing his features. The glare from the overhead light fixtures reflected from his dark pupils, the smile crinkling the dark skin at the corners of his eyes, as for the moment the world and the mess it was becoming fell away for both of them, bringing them back with sickening suddenness seconds later.

The appropriate seriousness was back as Darman, indicating the beds with a tilt of his chin, said, "After all, I don't want _you _to end up on one of those beds until my daughter's born."

"_Udesii, riduur_. I didn't plan on getting myself hurt. I just want to go back to _Aay'han_ and retrieve my lightsabers so I can work off my restless energy at the gym. Waiting is making me restless, and I never was any good at the patience excercises during training." Etain tried again to get up, and this time, Darman decided to let her.

As she approached the door, she turned her head around quickly, causing her long dark hair to fly out behind her. "If I'm not back in fourty-five minutes, send someone to look for me."

"Understood, ma'am." Darman answered almost without consious thought.

With that, Etain left the room.

As he watched his wife's form round a bend in the corridor through the transparisteel barrier representing the "wall" that medbay shared with the rest of the ship, Darman mentally berated himself for screwing up another conversation. _Good job, Skirata. Keep annoying her like that and she won't _let_ you be there at Calista's birth._

Sighing, he turned back to the uncomfortable sleepcouch, walked up to it with feet that felt like they were composed of a double digit weight of lead, and plopped down on the cushions, exhausted. Very probably, "cushion" was too generous a word to describe them, as they was little more than a streach of green fabric covering two sagging pads, the whole thing sitting on a hard, metalic set of crossing beams. The beams created an "X" about halfway between the cushions and the floor. The entire couch was approximately a meter tall.

On top of the already none too comfortable sleeping arrangements, Etain had done a lot of tossing and turning the previous night, keeping _him_ awake in the process.

...

_Wookiee Gunner _gymnasium

Eight minutes later

...

Going through katas at a slower pace than she had managed during the war, Etain didn't consciously notice the sweat that rolled down the sides of her face, slicking her hair and making it stick to her forehead.

Panting from exertion, she stopped her exercises, walked across the room, took a freshly washed towel from the room's entry desk and dried her hair, pushing it out of her eyes. Placing the towel around her neck, then reigniting her lightsabers, she started again. "I should have kept up some excercises after Order 66. _Shab_, I'm out of practice." She muttered before she registered the sound of the door into the room _woosh_ing open, then a corrisponding quiet _bump _of closing, two noises she wouldn't have noticed at all had she not been sunk as deeply as she ever had been in the Force. She didn't look up. She didn't divert any of her attention away from those motions to figure out who it was that had entered.

Peripherally, she was aware of the fact that someone was watching her, but she couldn't be bothered to check who it was. The two sabers, one hers and one Master Fulier's, cut through the air, traced colored lines of light and left heat trails in their wakes. The second to last move, a scything twirl, accomplished, she finished by crossing the blades X-shaped in front of her, before extinguishing the two weopons.

Finally turning to acknowledge her audience, she heard the sound of applause, and footsteps too, as someone crossed the room. She tensed up when she felt strong arms around her waist.

"_Et'ika_..." Hearing her name, spoken in a huskily whispered manner, allowed her to figure out who had her and relax, as she and Darman were the only beings aboard who knew _Mando'a_ to any real extent. "What's wrong? Did you not want an audience?"

A shiver of anticipation betrayed her attempt at coolness when she returned his question with her own. "Could you have warned me before doing that, _Dar'ika_? Seconds earlier and you would have been stabbed."

"I'm not careless. I_ know_ what those things can do." Etain felt Darman tilt his head against her shoulder from behind, his breath brushing past her ear as he spoke. "That's why I waited until you deactivated them to approach you."

"Just because the blades weren't on, it doesn't mean it's safe to sneak up on me like that. It doesn't take much pressure on the activation stud for them to be turned back on. I didn't even have time to take my thumb off of the stud on either weapon before you snuck up on me like a _di'kut_. Next time, you might not be so lucky."

"I'll remember that, my wife." He turned her around, took her small hand in his, which dwarfed hers, brought it to his lips, and kissed it, deciding on the chivalrous approach.

"What were you doing here, anyway?" He murmurred this with his lips still pressed against her fingers, playfulness and flirtation in his gaze, rising again from his semi bow and coming to an unconscious military pose, bringing his hands to his sides and taking her hand with his, holding it, while standing ramrod straight to his full height. His CO was annoyed with him, he realized. It was _sheb_ kissing time.

"What did it look like...? Stress-relief. Weren't you paying attention in medbay?" Etain's tone was irritated, and Darman knew it would _not _be a good idea to say something more without layering his answer with sweetness. He suspected that it was probably her pregnancy causing her moods to swing, and decided to proceed cautiously, as he would if he were traveling through a mine-field. Darman didn't know what he'd do if she burst into hysterical tears.

He was spared the necessity to speak, however, when she continued. "Ever since I told you I'm pregnant, you kept me in this tiny little bubble... I understand your need to protect me, but I'm tired of being _over_-protected." She reached her unrestrained arm around his neck, her fingers being wrapped up in his dark curls, and brought his head down so that their foreheads touched. "I can take care of myself, on a battlefield or anywhere else," she whispered to him.

"Do you remember what you told me our first night here, about taking on the Empire's special forces by myself? Here's my answer to that... It doesn't matter because I'm not alone, and neither are you. Whatever happens, we'll face it together, husband and wife forever. I mean that, _Et'ika._.. I need to get back to Kad. But this subject isn't closed. Don't shut me out. Agreed?"

"Yes, Dar; agreed." She removed her arm from around his neck, and was in the process of disentangling her fingers from his hair.

When he tried to help her by ducking away from her, her fingers weren't out of his short dark curls completely, and he felt his hair being pulled away from his scalp. "Um, ow... Etain."

Blushing slightly, Etain more gently finished the job she had started before accidently pulling his hair, affectionately brushing it back into place with her fingers. "Sorry, Dar. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"It was my fault. If I wasn't impatient, that wouldn't have happened." Kissing her, not caring that salty sweat still covered her skin, he turned toward the door again and, successfully this time, left the room.

Shaking her head, amused, Etain again wiped her face with the towel, went across the room, and opened the door to the shower room. There was a hamper in one of the corners immediately inside the door where she deposited the towel, as well as her clothes. Then entered a stall, closed the door behind her, and turned on the recycled water. Stepping into the stream, feeling the shower water pelt against her skin like a heavy downpour, she closed her eyes and let the water run over her hair and down her back. It really was rather relaxing; feeling the cares, however briefly, melt away.

The reclamation system was rather ingenious. Dirty water went in one end, through a series of scrubbers similar to the ones in the now destroyed Jedi Temple on Coruscant, and a small meditation grotto where any non microscopic particles were filtered out under the floor. Then when one tried to use it again, it came out cleaner than it had been when it was first pumped into the hold on a stopover. That happened every time it was used. The water was pumped out of the hold every time the _Wookiee Gunner _returned to a port and replaced, and the process repeated from the beginning.

After several minutes, she heard the door open and a semi familliar voice calling her name.

"Over here, Callista," Etain called back, turning off the water. "Would you mind getting me another towel and something to wear? I was an idiot and forgot to bring a change of clothes with me when I came in."

"Sure."

"How did you find me, anyway?" Etain's curiosity got the better of her.

"Your husband. He was on his way out when I came down to do some excercises of my own."

"Great. I just finished talking to him about that, too." Etain shook her head hard to dry it more quickly by removing the extra water.

Etain heard the smile in her friend's voice. "Men; you can't live with them and you can't live without them."

The door opened, and then closed. Etain was alone again in the shower room. While she waited for Callista to come back, Etain thought about what her friend had revealed. _Blast it, why did he do that?_ _He _said_ he wouldn't._ Shrugging in defeat, Etain decided to pass the time by wringing her dark hair, which somehow always seemed to grow darker when wet, out as much as she could with her hands, gathering it up in a sopping ponytail and drawing her hands slowly from just beneath her scalp toward the light blue tiles of the shower flooring, repeating the process three times before deciding to let it go at what she had managed.

A few more minutes came and went before Callista returned and handed her a towel over the stall door, which she took. "Thanks." Etain began drying off her hair. "Uhm, Callista? Clothes, please."

"Here you go." A fresh sweatshirt and long pants appeared over the top of the door.

After wrapping the towel around her hair, Etain tucked the lowest end inside the part wrapped over and around the crown of her head. She took the clothes and placed them on a ledge in the shower stall, before grabbing the pants and pulling them on. "Perfect size. Where did you find them?"

"Your husband went back to your ship and got them."

"Of course he did," Etain muttered, amused. "Thanks again, Callista."

"The man waits on you hand and foot, Etain. If I weren't already engaged, and I didn't know the answer, I'd ask where you got him."

"If you weren't betrothed to someone else, I'd tell you. There are more where he came from, deserters all."

"As mountains are slowly tempered by a river, so too will faith in this so called Empire chip away among the common people of the galaxy. There will come a time, most likely in all of our lifetimes, when Palpatine _will _be knocked off his perch."

"I wish I could believe that it will happen _before_ faith in the Jedi is completely eradicated, Callista. But I can't. You weren't there for most of the war. Even then, Palpatine was going out of his way when and where he could to discredit the Jedi."

"Etain, do you know where the troops under you were the last battle of the war, before the order to kill us went out?"

"Most of them. I didn't have direct control over the deployment of very many squads as the war ended. Veshok was on a prep mission to Nar Shaddaa. Delta was helping me kick the Seps off of Kashyyyk, Omega had just returned to Coruscant after another job well done. Yoda had recalled me to Coruscant. I was fortunate that I had one of my father in law's friends on the transport back, rather than Delta, because, knowing their training sergeant, I don't think I would have stood a chance against them had it come to that."

"I'd say your son was particularly lucky that your troops weren't there, then."

After three years, Etain had grown used to relying on troopers and commandos. Now, she was re-learning by necessity to stand on her own two feet, with little support from anyone except Omega, the Nulls and a select few others.

"He was," Etain confirmed. Finally fully clothed, she stepped out of the stall. "But, even though I made it this far, Kad's not at all confident that I'll be around for much longer,"

"What do you mean?"

Etain sat on one of the two benches in the room, pulled on her socks, which had been rolled up in the other clothes, and looked up at her friend.

"Kad had been... I don't know how to describe it, having nightmares, I guess, is the best way to say it. Or visions, or something, before he became sick." She flashed back to her last conversations with her son, right before he passed out. "That, and interactions with another former Jedi, were what convinced me to come here. I trust my son's judgement, sometimes more than I trust my own."

Very briefly, Etain partially unraveled the hair wrap and shook out her hair, the towel flapping around. "Speaking of Kad, I really need to be getting back to him."

"I understand. I'll see you later, Etain."

Standing up, Etain called after her friend, who had turned to leave, "Callista?"

Half turning back, the other woman replied, "Yes?"

Smiling, Etain answered. "Thank you... for everything."


	8. Chapter 7

AN: After being forced by circumstances beyond both of our control to stop working together as beta\writer, Fires has stepped down. In her place, hopefully for the duration, is lionesseyes13. Thank you both.

Chapter 8

_The Force works in mysterious ways._

**Many Jedi**

**different times, different places **

Mando'a-

Cyar'ika- love (anyone deserving of affection-primarily a child, boy\girlfriend, or husband\wife- can be described thus)

Riduur- title specific to husband or wife

**main bedroom aboard **_**Aay'han, Wookiee Gunner**_**'s hangar bay**

**10 days after Order 66, 1530 hours (3:30 after mid-day)**

As soon as her eyes closed, Etain felt some of her worst memories from before the war come to the front of her mind, the memories that she had tried for most of her life to rid herself of:

_A man, her Master-the only being who had ever believed she would amount to anything- lay on a bed in the Temple's medbay, more dead than alive. The healers had explained to her there was very little that they could do. They'd established as much in that coldly detatched way characteristic not only medics, but of Jedi. Vivid lights blurred through her tears, as she silently begged her Master not to die. She was sick, as well. Otherwise, the healers would never have let her have even this much time by his side. Sick or not, the most the healers would give her was thirty standard minutes with him. _

_"He has to rest, Padawan," they had said._

_"If he's going to die either way, what difference does it make?" she responded, embittered and defeated. "And don't give me that `way of the Force' junk. Please, at least, don't tell me _that_."_

_"Calm yourself, or you won't have any time with him." The harsh response was as much as she could have expected. She had grown used to it during the fifteen years she had been in the Temple, especially on the recieving end. Her body was tense, and it took everything in her to even remember how to take the calming breaths the healers expected of her. And to avoid strangling the kriffing idiots with her bare hands... which would have been a more realistic idea if she weren't the size of a small marine crustacean in comparison to them._

_It would be sooo easy, the part of herself that she had been struggling with since being brought to the Temple told her. They're an obstacle to what you want._

STOP! _She shook her head to clear it. Her common sense was battling with her barely restrained anger. _You'll be thrown out of training; the Masters told you exactly how thin the ice you're walking on is. Then what good will you do anyone?

_"Much better now, youngling." The title of the youngest of all Jedi Apprentices had always made her bristle. She absolutely hated the feeling of insignificance the address gave her. After all, it wasn't as though she needed any help feeling useless._

Are the healers calling me that as some kind of test?_ she wondered. _Keep my head as cool as it can be when I'm running a fever. _Or else._

She couldn't lose it now. She knew it was a dream, that she was as safe as she could be. It didn't make enduring this again any easier. This was meant to tell her something. The question now was, what was the intention of this dream. What was she supposed to discover with this _torture_? There wasn't a better word for the nightmare she had just endured.

Without being given time to overcome the trauma of re-living it, wake up, or discover it's reason, she was drawn back again to another part of the same week in her own childhood...

_As dawn broke, some of the Masters, including Kenobi, who had also been sick with whatever this was recieved visitors. Etain knew this because the bed she had been given when the outbreak started was in the same part of the healer's ward as Master Kenobi. Although she wasn't completely certain, she suspected that a certain young, upstart Padawan, Anakin Skywalker, had passed this Force-forsaken curse around the hallway where both of their Master-Padawan shared quarters were._

_And one of the visitors was none other than Skywalker himself. _Oh, sure, Skywalker... rub it in why don't you?_ Why was it that every other Padawan but her with an ill Master got to visit? _I thought Jedi didn't play favorites.

_As though she had consciously broadcast her thoughts, and she couldn't be entirely certain that she hadn't, the other Padawan looked in her direction and smiled._ _Or perhaps smirked would be more accurate._ Well, if that's the way it's going to be:_ *You're a show-off, Skywalker._* _That time, it was definately intentional._

_*Jealous? Tsk, tsk... I thought we were supposed to be above that.*_

_The fact that he was correct only served to annoy Etain that much more thoroughly than the statement by itself ever could have._

_*You're a fine one to talk, Skywalker... I hear you have something of a temper in your own right.*_

_"Now you're _acting _like a youngling. Nice going," she muttered this, barely audible even to herself. _

_"Enough, that is. Jedi Tur-Mukan; Jedi Skywalker, calm yourselves, you must, or allow you to stay with your Masters, I will not." Yoda was repremanding them now. A Jedi couldn't be in much more trouble than that._

_"Sorry, Master Yoda." Both Padawans replied contritely, although on Anakin's part, there was also badly concealed surliness._

_Yoda turned his attention back to his conversation with Barriss Offee, a Padawan like Etain and Anakin and a specialist in the healing arts, leaving the Padawans unattended and alone with their Masters and each other._

As if from a distance at first, Etain heard her name being called, the voice sounding semi-metalic through _Aay'han_'s hallway. "Etain..._Cyar'ika_, do you want something to eat?"

Groaning quietly, she turned over and tried to fall back asleep. She was quickly forced to realize, however, when she heard the door of the cabin open across the room, that Darman wasn't about to let her off that easily.

This impression was confirmed when Darman's hand wrapped around her shoulder and gently shook her awake.

She tried to bat his hand away.

"I knew you were awake, _riduur._ You couldn't fool me." Darman's deep and quietly growled whisper came from centimeters away from her ear.

Etain rolled partway over toward the direction his voice came from to find him almost on top of her. "How does such a muscular man walk so quietly? One second I heard the door, the next thing I knew..."

"How tired were you, anyway? You've been down here for three hours."

"Thr-..._Why _didn't you call me?"

"Kad didn't wake up yet. I thought you told me to call you if he woke up while you were relaxing." Darman's ever patient nature would have given even the most seasoned Jedi Masters a run for their credits.

"Fair enough, Dar. I did say that." Rolling over in the other direction, Etain started to finish getting out of bed. It was about time she took over bedside duty in the medbay.

"So, food?"

"Please," she answered agreeably, nodding. Then she amended, "Well, anything but field rations. I had my fill of those for life in the first six months of the war. You might want to bring whatever it is to me in medbay, though."

"How about muja muffins? They do have some _very _tasty muffins in the messhall," he suggested, lying down flat on the bed beside her but staying on top of the ultra-thin thermal blanket.

Etain's eyebrow quirked upward, causing Darman to start chuckling.

"What?" She held the expression for several more seconds before she could no longer contain her own giggle fit.

"I was about to ask you the same thing. Okay, since you asked... Did anyone other than me ever tell you how adorable you are?" Darman reached his arm out to stop her from going farther, grabbing her left leg gently, and rolled her back to face him, before leaning over and pushing her into the bed to hold her there. He slowly drew himself up along the outline of her body, keeping a small space between them by holding himself in a push up position.

Etain felt a shiver of anticipation at his closeness, which she quickly squashed, and briefly became reflective. When she answered, Darman's heart broke at what she said. "Nobody that I can remember... my biological parents might have, but I can't remember a thing about them. Before I met you, my Master was one of the few beings who would think to give me the time of day."

"_Riduur, _I..."

"No, it's fine Dar. I came to terms with it years ago."

Deciding that the only safe move to lighten the mood a bit was to change the subject, Darman said, putting his hand on her stomach, "And coming to see if _this_ little one was still among the living." With that, he slid down on the bed to kiss Etain's still flat stomach.

"She is." Etain confirmed.

Only when the conversation stopped did Darman hear a soft repetitive swishing sound, his daughter's heart as projected through the monitor they had brought with them.

Their eyes met, and their shared connection seemed to fill the room, when Etain answered his unvoiced query. "Yes, Dar. That's the child you asked for at Laseema's, alive and well."


End file.
